099: SEND IT – 2022 Alpha Quorum Man of the Year David Scofield
099: SEND IT – 2022 Alpha Quorum Man of the Year David Scofield
Meet Sco, a man recognized as one who epitomizes the alpha way: living life with no excuses. He was honored for his attitude and his actions and his many alpha attributes. He’s a married father of two girls. He works as a welder. He’s a musician, a motorcycle enthusiast, an adventurer and a mechanic. He served in Afghanistan with the United States Air Force and has been a huge advocate for mental health care, especially for veterans and first responders. One of his projects this year included opening the Nevada chapter of Heroes on the Water, a nonprofit that gets veterans and first responders out on the water for fishing and boating adventures. He organized a classic car parade and car show for seniors in an assisted living facility, and has now arranged for men’s groups for these senior men.
He describes his views on spirituality, that the deepest part of us is all the same. He recounts experiences fishing with his dad, how he got into his career, his parenting philosophy, how he does husbandry and why he is so committed to helping other people. This dude is inspiring and demonstrates with his life the slogan “No Excuses. Alpha Up.”
FULL TRANSCRIPT
00:00:00:02 – 00:00:20:19
Brad Singletary
This year, another man is recognized as one who epitomizes the alpha way, living with no excuses. He was nominated and then selected by a committee to be honored for his attitude and his actions and his many alpha attributes. He’s a married father of two girls. He works as a welder. He’s a musician. A motorcycle enthusiast an adventurer and mechanic.
00:00:20:26 – 00:00:45:19
Brad Singletary
He served in Afghanistan with the United States Air Force and has been a huge advocate for mental health care, especially for veterans and first responders. One of his projects this year included opening the Nevada chapter of Heroes on the Water, a nonprofit who gets veterans and first responders out on the water for fishing and boating adventures. He organized a classic car parade and car show for seniors in an assisted living facility.
00:00:45:24 – 00:01:05:16
Brad Singletary
He was also very instrumental in many improvements made in the hours of quorum, a worldwide men’s organization that now gives him this honor. Gentlemen, I present to you the 2022 Alpha Core, a Man of the Year, David Schofield.
00:01:10:10 – 00:01:33:12
Intro
If you’re a man that controls his own destiny, a man that is always in the pursuit of being better, you are in the right place. You are responsible. You are strong. You are a leader. You are a force for good, gentlemen. You are the alpha. And this is the alpha core.
00:01:36:26 – 00:02:10:23
Brad Singletary
Welcome back to the Alpha Quorum Show Brad Singletary here. It’s been a little while. It’s been a while since I’ve been here. And I couldn’t be more excited than I am tonight to be here with my friend who is the Alpha Quorum’s 2022, Man of the year. This man was nominated and selected by a committee to represent what it is that we teach in the Alpha Quorum, which is responsibility, resourcefulness, reverence, energy, engagement, endurance, discipline, discernment and distinction.
00:02:11:13 – 00:02:39:12
Brad Singletary
And this is a guy that I’ve known for a while, and as I put together some of the stuff that I’m going to include later in the show, I’ll just going to kind of drop it in. I had no idea what a bad ass this guy is until I heard from his wife, his parents, two sets of parents, parents and step parents and learned about some of the things that he’s done over the past year.
00:02:39:28 – 00:02:53:06
Brad Singletary
Some of those I knew about, but gosh, is going to choke me up to think about some of these things that he’s done. So, gentlemen, I just want to welcome David Schofield. Thanks, Brad, and welcome.
00:02:53:11 – 00:03:05:24
David Scofield
Thank you. I appreciate it. And it’s is it’s surreal to be on the same list of some of my own mentors that I don’t know. It’s an it’s unreal to me.
00:03:06:26 – 00:03:32:02
Brad Singletary
Yeah. There’s you know, we just want to I think something that’s missing in the world is the recognition of dudes that are doing great things. So that’s that’s part of why this whole thing exists. That’s why we do in June, we do a father of the year at the end of the year. I always know when when it’s when they’re talking about the Heisman Trophy so early December is when, you know, that’s when it’s time to to start putting this together for the man of the year.
00:03:32:18 – 00:03:56:18
Brad Singletary
And you’re exactly one of those kind of dudes. And I just have to say, while we were trying to set this appointment up tonight to record, Dave here just got back. He was out of town for a while with for the holidays. Visiting family, drove hours and hours with his very young children and wonderful. He mentioned on his Facebook he had to stop every 20 minutes.
00:03:57:02 – 00:04:14:08
Brad Singletary
But then he had a buddy coming over that he’s going to take care of is one of his pets before he you know, deploys overseas or something. And still he was here 5 minutes early. And, you know, I was kind of thinking I I’m watching the clock thinking, you know, I wouldn’t be too mad if he if he canceled tonight.
00:04:14:08 – 00:04:32:02
Brad Singletary
I could I could just go home and call it a night. But here he is, right on time, right on the money, just like everybody said that you are reliable and that you do anything to help. And so part of this man is to honor you even further, to hear more about you. We’ve we’ve learned about you from your parents on this video that we’ll kind of clip in here.
00:04:32:02 – 00:04:36:29
Brad Singletary
But we want to hear some things from you yourself. So, first of all, how old are you?
00:04:37:28 – 00:04:42:08
David Scofield
I’m 30. I turned 34 in February. Okay. Thank.
00:04:43:04 – 00:04:48:06
Brad Singletary
So 34. So pretty young guy. Married two daughters who are. How old are.
00:04:48:06 – 00:04:52:11
David Scofield
They? My daughters are almost two and just turned four.
00:04:54:11 – 00:05:14:22
Brad Singletary
This guy, I can’t remember what pictures we included in the video, but he is a very you’re a very involved dad. So you’re you’re not one of these dudes who’s just, you know, paying the bills and kind of leaving it up to others. You’re doing a lot of parenting. You’re doing a lot of fun things with them. Probably my favorite picture of you is with Jade.
00:05:15:03 – 00:05:31:22
Brad Singletary
I think she’s up under your truck or Ensign, and she was like, helping you in the garage. Like all up in there. You know, And you’re you’re kind of leading her through that. And and, of course, you know, sometimes they may not be the best job hands, but but you’re you’re having a moment there. You’re teaching them the little things.
00:05:31:22 – 00:05:36:12
Brad Singletary
And that was that was pretty awesome to see. You talk about your your your role as a dad.
00:05:37:00 – 00:05:48:26
David Scofield
Well, my main my main role or my main goal with two daughters is to, uh, I want I want them to be able to change their boyfriends. You know, boyfriends, oil and his car when I do that, because.
00:05:49:02 – 00:05:50:02
Brad Singletary
That’s that’s like.
00:05:51:04 – 00:06:06:07
David Scofield
The state of things right now. I don’t know. That might be the case, but, um, no, I just, uh, I think it’s super important to be involved in, in my kid’s life to have fun with them and do fun stuff with them. I don’t know. Teach them.
00:06:07:14 – 00:06:17:21
Brad Singletary
Yeah, man. So you’re in the silly, you know, Halloween costumes. You’re. I swear, I’ve seen you dress up like, I don’t know whether one of them was a princess or you were you.
00:06:17:21 – 00:06:18:05
David Scofield
You guys.
00:06:19:01 – 00:06:40:07
Brad Singletary
You had these, like, jeans, shorts, jorts like overalls and kind of dress up. Kind of similar to your daughter out in LA. That looked like a big family barbecue or something. But you’re just involved. You’re engaged. That’s one of the one of our Red nine principles is engagement that you just participate with good vibes, You participate with good vibes.
00:06:40:07 – 00:06:44:04
Brad Singletary
I mean, that’s everything that I’ve seen and known about with you and your kids. That’s what you’re doing.
00:06:44:26 – 00:07:12:14
David Scofield
Right? Um, I think so. I appreciate that. It’s, it’s, it’s definitely, it takes a lot of effort to to do that, but it’s so, it’s so worth it. Just spending it spending the time with kids and with my kids and being able to have fun with them and and teach them lessons through experience in life is I think it’s insanely valuable for them.
00:07:12:14 – 00:07:18:09
David Scofield
And then for me, it helps me a lot. I learn a lot from hanging out with kids, from hanging out with my kids.
00:07:19:20 – 00:07:27:03
Brad Singletary
Yeah, they teach you about life. Maybe they teach you about just a fresh perspective, but they probably teach you about yourself.
00:07:27:03 – 00:07:56:13
David Scofield
To teach me a lot about myself. I learn. I get to learn, uh, how. How frustrated I can get at the pettiest shit sometimes. And they’re a real vehicle for me to better myself when I can. I can kind of spot that kind of stuff in my self frustration, you know, and little things and being able to notice that in myself and kind of spread it throughout the rest of my life.
00:07:58:06 – 00:08:08:22
Brad Singletary
You talk about frustration. One of your buddies on there, I forget his name, but he said he’s known you pretty much your whole life and he’s never seen you in a bad mood. Is that true?
00:08:08:28 – 00:08:13:06
David Scofield
I don’t know about that. Maybe when I’m around my friends, I’m not really a bad man.
00:08:13:06 – 00:08:29:26
Brad Singletary
That’s why it’s always a good time. Some. You got a beer in your hand or something? Cause going to have some fun. What about with your kids? I mean, they. They see you’re frustrated. And if you ever do become, you know, angry, irritated or frustrated, what do you do after that?
00:08:29:28 – 00:09:02:26
David Scofield
Well, I think it’s I think it’s important to let them see me have emotion and then, um, correct it and go, you know, I don’t know how many times I’ve apologized to a four year old for being frustrated and, you know, hey, sorry I was frustrated at this. You know, I think it’s important for them to learn that it’s okay to to be pissed off, to be frustrated and sad and, you know, all that kind of stuff.
00:09:02:26 – 00:09:19:28
David Scofield
And through them, seeing me frustrated, that doesn’t give me an excuse to be frustrated right. But through them seeing that and then trying to trying to fix it, I think they can they can learn that having those feelings is fine and then they get to process them afterwards.
00:09:20:16 – 00:09:41:02
Brad Singletary
Oh, I love that so much, man. One of my one of our common heroes and mentors is Taco Mike SPURGEON. And that’s something that he taught me. Use whatever emotion you have. You feel what you feel, and you know, you got to keep yourself, you know, restrained to some degree, but it’s okay to feel things exactly like you’re saying.
00:09:42:01 – 00:10:02:07
Brad Singletary
I believe the same thing. I’ve never been one to, you know, take a fight with my wife that we can only do this in the bedroom. They can never hear us argue. I want them to see us have some issue. There’s some flare ups here and there. And I want to see us hug at the end that you can feel what you feel.
00:10:03:08 – 00:10:29:01
Brad Singletary
And it doesn’t have to be destructive. And you can take responsibility for it and be accountable and apologize if necessary. That I think that’s very healthy versus a lot of men stone cold, you know, stay away from emotion or they’ve bottled it up for so long that they really do have, you know, explosive situations. And then it’s almost they’ve never seen you get angry until you really lost it.
00:10:29:25 – 00:10:34:07
Brad Singletary
So some regular feelings as human. That’s normal.
00:10:34:16 – 00:10:34:28
David Scofield
Yeah.
00:10:36:19 – 00:10:44:05
Brad Singletary
So there were some exciting things in there just with your, like, hobbies. You’re a you’re a fisherman.
00:10:44:24 – 00:10:45:07
David Scofield
Love it.
00:10:45:10 – 00:10:49:28
Brad Singletary
How did you how did you start with that? Because I see your teaching. Your girls, even, you know, they were out there fishing with you.
00:10:50:05 – 00:11:23:16
David Scofield
Um, my dad, my biological dad, he. He’s been into it forever. So my first memories of fishing were, you know, with him going out, we would go. We’d go to, like, trout ponds, um, where they stocked a ton of trout and I knew, like, pay per trout that you catch. Like, it’s not really fishing. It was just let’s go catch some fish doing that and then going out on barges and doing deep sea stuff with them.
00:11:24:15 – 00:11:43:26
David Scofield
It really fizzled out a lot, you know, through life. But it’s it’s something that I’ve come back to and it’s it’s a thing that I can I can really find some peace in, you know, I can recenter myself after just kind of living in this crazy ass world and going through the meat grinder every day.
00:11:44:15 – 00:12:01:21
Brad Singletary
Yeah. It seems like some of the value of that stuff is not just if you catch fish or not, but it’s the opportunity to get away, Get out in nature. There’s some solitude. Maybe. I don’t know if you’re most of the time by yourself or you know you’re off by yourself. Even if you’re with someone, you have some quiet.
00:12:02:05 – 00:12:22:28
Brad Singletary
You’re just kind of connecting with the earth. And I mean, that’s that seems like some of the coolest parts of that. I grew up we were commercial fishermen. We had a crabbing business down in Florida, so we fished a lot of different kinds of things. But I lost the appreciation for that, I think because it was work, it was how our family fed ourselves and stuff.
00:12:22:28 – 00:12:28:04
Brad Singletary
And this seems like you’ve gone back to some of your roots with that as a way to find enjoyment.
00:12:28:19 – 00:12:55:27
David Scofield
Right? Yeah, It’s, uh, it lets me it really provides something for me to slow my mind down and focus on something else other than all the things you know, We just have so many stressors and all kinds of shit you got to worry about. That’s a bunch of stuff that’s in the future, and it’s something that that keeps me in the now and lets me focus on exactly what I’m doing.
00:12:56:12 – 00:13:15:12
David Scofield
Kind of hang out. Some fishing is more intense than others. You know, some stuff’s pretty, you know, like tournament fishing gets pretty wild and you’re really focused in on the day and then you’ve got some days you just kind of bait and wait and sit down and drink a couple drinks, you know, whatever those may be and hang out.
00:13:15:12 – 00:13:17:28
David Scofield
And that’s they’re both just as valuable.
00:13:18:17 – 00:13:29:04
Brad Singletary
What’s been your most meaningful, like fishing experience? Was it a tournament, something with your dad? I mean, you probably have so many, but talk about some that were just super cool for you.
00:13:30:19 – 00:14:03:29
David Scofield
Yeah, anytime I’ve I’ve gone out and gone out with my dad has been real cool. There’s one fairly recently, maybe a year or two ago, we went, we went out and we did some deep sea fishing. We did a, we did a 24 hour trip as a as a one day. And we went out. Newport went out to San Clemente Island to try to go get some try, go get some Bluefin, some yellowtail stuff like that.
00:14:04:16 – 00:14:31:13
David Scofield
And I was able to was me, my dad, my father in law and one of my brother in laws through marriage. But it was real cool because we got to go we got to hang out with each other and and be around each other. And most of us, my dad, I think in that video he said, I’ll let you catch some biggest fish next time.
00:14:33:04 – 00:14:55:06
David Scofield
He caught a he caught a fish that time and the rest of us did not. So I don’t know. I think it’s cool that we were able to go. We were able to hang out and we I mean, we sailed together for the most part, you know, like it was it was kind of a bust as far as catching goes.
00:14:55:20 – 00:15:05:00
David Scofield
But it was a good time to be around each other. Road trip with my father in law and a brother of mine. And, uh, go hang out with Dad. And I don’t know.
00:15:05:11 – 00:15:25:04
Brad Singletary
We talked so much about adventure and the need for men to just get out, have some kind of all day or multi-day adventure. Sounds like this was. That was exactly one of those kinds of things for you. What other what other cool adventures have you been on in your life, man? You these pictures and these video, the pictures in the video are just show a lot of fun stuff.
00:15:25:04 – 00:15:25:27
Brad Singletary
You done, man?
00:15:26:15 – 00:15:55:26
David Scofield
Yeah, I’m I’m a I’m a sucker for the, you know, the kind of adrenaline coursing through my veins. It doesn’t really present itself like that while you’re in it. And most of the time it just I think it’s just, uh, I really like that focus that you get that zones everything in your life out, and you just can focus on exactly what you’re doing.
00:15:55:26 – 00:16:11:18
David Scofield
And I’ve found that through several things. Yeah. Um, we’ve got some pictures up of highlighting that was, that was a big part of my life for a few years. Um.
00:16:11:28 – 00:16:18:22
Brad Singletary
Describe what that is. I know just from looking at the pictures, but for these guys on the, in the, in the audience, not knowing what highlighting is.
00:16:20:16 – 00:16:47:03
David Scofield
Basically basically the easiest way to explain it would be it’s almost like a tightrope between cliffs you go, you go up there, hike up, climb, do whatever, get to ends of a canyon and rig up a bunch of ropes and webbing and and walk across, walk back and forth.
00:16:47:13 – 00:16:52:24
Brad Singletary
Oh, that’s crazy. So this this line is how wide is the line? Um.
00:16:53:06 – 00:16:56:27
David Scofield
Usually it’s one inch thick when you’re just one inch wide. Yeah, one.
00:16:56:27 – 00:17:02:11
Brad Singletary
Inch. So that’s like the size of a ruler, right? That’s the thickness.
00:17:02:11 – 00:17:12:19
David Scofield
Of a Yeah, it’s fun. It’s a good time. Yeah. We had a lot of crazy adventures doing that. Um.
00:17:13:19 – 00:17:20:26
Brad Singletary
You have, like, a harness or. You’re right, there’s a little something around your foot. Or how do you know you’re not going to plummet to your death at the bottom?
00:17:21:09 – 00:17:47:11
David Scofield
Like, mentally, you know that that’s most likely not going to happen. Um, yeah. You have a harness. You’re wearing, like a climbing harness and a rope that goes from reclining harness to, like, a a ring that goes around the webbing that you’re walking on normally trails behind you. And if you fall, it’s, uh, it’s a scary moment, but it’s.
00:17:47:12 – 00:17:49:12
David Scofield
It’s pretty exhilarating. It’s fun.
00:17:50:19 – 00:17:52:29
Brad Singletary
No way, dude. That’s the stuff of nightmares. I mean.
00:17:53:16 – 00:17:55:17
David Scofield
Yeah. No, it’s good. I don’t know.
00:17:56:25 – 00:18:02:22
Brad Singletary
So do you stop that? Or how come you’re still doing it? Or when? When did you hang that up?
00:18:02:22 – 00:18:28:05
David Scofield
I stopped doing that. Um, it’s been a few years since I’ve been on a high line. That was. I don’t know, I kind of. I’m kind of a hobby hopper. Um, I got into it. I kind of. I You hit or I hit like, a like a climax. Like a like a high point in learning where I’m learning fast, learning fast.
00:18:28:05 – 00:19:10:12
David Scofield
Like just exponential growth. And then you hit a point where it’s where I would hit a point where where something gets a lot more difficult to progress. And the and then that’s when I find like, okay, well, maybe there’s something else I can progress in a lot. I like to learn a lot about things. So when I get to a point where I know obviously I don’t know everything about it, but I get to a point where something becomes just exponentially harder, way more difficult, I get more joy out of learning something new.
00:19:11:02 – 00:19:27:10
Brad Singletary
Yeah. So you kind of mastered the the basics or the intermediate level stuff and then you’re on to the next hobby, right? Hop on the next kind of fun, fun thing to do. And you’ve, you’ve had a number of those. So your work talk about your work like you’re a welder.
00:19:27:20 – 00:19:28:04
David Scofield
Right?
00:19:28:04 – 00:19:48:04
Brad Singletary
And how did you get into that stuff? I think that’s fascinating. I we were talking earlier about my son. My oldest son is kind of pursuing that in school right now and just loves it. It’s just so manly. I mean, maybe they’re women welders, too, of course. But, you know, you’re you’re putting pieces of steel together and steel or iron.
00:19:48:04 – 00:20:24:28
David Scofield
Steel. Steel. Yeah. So I got into welding. I was working over at Circus Circus. I was in the Adventure Dome, working on maintaining the rides. So climb and roller coasters and, you know, just working on the rides, doing preventative maintenance stuff, doing tear downs and rebuilds and all that kind of stuff. And I liked I just liked the idea of, you know, there was guys there that were welding and I liked the idea of of getting up on a on a track or welding.
00:20:24:28 – 00:21:03:16
David Scofield
You know, I just liked what they were doing and it was something that I could learn. And it’s back to that, you know, learning process. I like to learn new stuff. So that’s really that’s where it started. It started there and I had a lot of help there, a lot of guys. I really knew what they were doing and I would spend time before or after work and just well, and I was lucky enough to have the guys there to, you know, give me some pointers here and there and kind of teach me did some welding there and then and then found a job and got lucky, you know, lucky finding a real good job
00:21:03:16 – 00:21:03:28
David Scofield
for it.
00:21:04:22 – 00:21:21:25
Brad Singletary
Do you think this is your, you know, career home? Is this, you know, really solid and stable? You’re do you enjoy it enough that you think you’ll continue this throughout your life or you’re going to get on a new hobby? What did you call it? Hobby hopping, you know, in a new type of career was hard to know.
00:21:21:25 – 00:21:56:14
David Scofield
So I’ve battled for a long time like, what am I what do I want to do for the rest of my life? Or, you know, like choosing a career for me was always a very difficult thing. And when I finally found welding, I was a late twenties. Um, I was maybe 30 years old when I started welding. Uh, no, I was late twenties Anyways, um, that kind of drew me in to what would be okay for a career.
00:21:57:04 – 00:22:32:01
David Scofield
Um, I feel like anything most things, you know, there’s like, uh, there’s kind of this pipe dream. I think that a lot of people have, including myself, that, you know, you find something and you just dedicate yourself to it and it’s going to work out and it can be your career. And that works out for some people. But for the majority of us, we got to find something, You know, like I enjoy welding, I like welding.
00:22:32:24 – 00:22:40:14
David Scofield
But if I, if I won the lottery, I’m not going to go to work tomorrow. You know.
00:22:40:15 – 00:22:42:03
Brad Singletary
I’m married to welding forever.
00:22:42:08 – 00:23:05:24
David Scofield
Right? But I’ve found my I found my place in it. It’s something that I do enjoy doing and I don’t I don’t hate going to work, you know, I enjoy it a lot of the time. And it’s honestly, it comes down to it does it? It takes care of it takes care of the family. Takes care of it.
00:23:06:00 – 00:23:25:22
David Scofield
It’s got us our house. It’s got us cool stuff for the kids. Um, and, you know, it provides in that way. And really the way I look at it is just it’s just, it’s what I do in the mornings. I work from 6 to 2, Monday to Friday, and, uh, you know, that’s what I do in the mornings.
00:23:25:22 – 00:23:28:27
David Scofield
The rest of my life is, is, is more. So my it’s.
00:23:28:27 – 00:23:29:28
Brad Singletary
The real work and it’s.
00:23:29:28 – 00:23:32:03
David Scofield
The real world. That’s, yeah, that’s the real stuff.
00:23:32:03 – 00:24:10:28
Brad Singletary
I’m yeah, that’s how I feel, man. Work is just what I do to get away from my real job, which is being at home and being a dad. And this is kind of my fun work is fun for me. So, so I’m curious about your spirituality because when I look at this video and I hear the things that people say about you, it just seems like you have you know, he’s walking around helping people and spending every opportunity that you can to to bring love and, you know, bring light to people’s life, to bring some kind of, you know, assistance or help, something that we didn’t get in the video.
00:24:11:21 – 00:24:38:28
Brad Singletary
There was a guy that Scott and I both knew who was a retiree. You know, he basically lives alone. Um, divorced and lives alone kind of retirement age and, and is often maybe down. And Schofield here invited him fishing and he just picked this whole guy up and they went out and fished. And I don’t know whether or not you caught any fish, but man, that kind of thing.
00:24:39:19 – 00:25:04:29
Brad Singletary
That’s something that this dude still talks about as a very meaningful experience in like his whole life. So anyway, spirituality, because I think that’s obviously very different from from religion. Some people use religion for spirituality, but what is your sense of like the inner world of like purpose or just I’ll just let you take it from there? How do you see spirituality.
00:25:05:11 – 00:25:42:00
David Scofield
Spirituality So for me, this is something that I’ve I’ve learned a lot this year, specifically, Um, I’ve always, I’ve always so I grew up in, in religion and, um, there’s there are, there are definitely parts of it that made sense to me, Um, yeah, being kind of people, you know, being cool with other people, helping each other out, that kind of stuff.
00:25:43:00 – 00:26:15:07
David Scofield
And then it gets into weird rules and, and some, you know, some crazy stuff that just didn’t make sense to me. And that’s where, where religion loses me. Um, but I, I kept that, uh, I try to keep that base of just kindness and love with in day to day life. And sometimes it doesn’t show up every single day, right?
00:26:15:07 – 00:26:57:24
David Scofield
But it, uh, I try to make it or I try to have it show up on a fairly regular basis. Um, let’s see. So one of the big things I learned this year, it was actually kind of a crazy, kind of a crazy thing. I so I came to the group Facebook page and I brought up, um, I brought up a trouble that I’ve had for a long time with, um, with self, like, how do you love yourself?
00:26:59:08 – 00:27:18:09
David Scofield
And went into this thing about it and, you know, I just, I have trouble like loving myself. I always see all the things that I could be doing better, you know? You see, I really all those things stick out to me. It doesn’t matter what I’ve done or how good I’ve done. You can always do better. Always. Forever.
00:27:18:10 – 00:27:49:19
David Scofield
Right. Um, so I have those were kind of my focuses and I have, I don’t know, I had a lot of really bad kind of self-talk about stuff like that and, and just needing to do better, wanting to do better. And anyways, I brought that to the group on Facebook and somebody, somebody mentioned a book and they stated that the author was Eckhart Totally.
00:27:50:27 – 00:28:26:12
David Scofield
But looking for the book under Eckhart totally didn’t come up. He accidentally put Eckhart Totally. Long story short, I’m in a I got into a kind of a rabbit hole of Eckhart Totally. And through listening. So Eckhart totally is a spiritual leader. He’s a spiritual teacher. He’s really, really cool. He takes he takes things from a bunch of different religions and brings them all together.
00:28:26:13 – 00:29:14:21
David Scofield
Um, he calls he calls a lot of it signposting, like, uh, like religions or signposting. They’re all kind of pointing in the same direction, but teaching it a little bit different and whatnot. So he uses a lot of the, the teachings from like Christ or Buddha or what have you, um, but the, the, the big thing, spirituality wise, that has all kind of come full circle and is really hit home for me this year in particular, is that we are he uses he uses the word human being as two words.
00:29:14:21 – 00:30:09:06
David Scofield
We have our human side and we have our we have our being. And our human side is our, our that’s that’s the side that’s programed. That’s, you know, from from birth til this very moment, you’re you’re learning. You’re almost like a computer learning through your life experience. Um, and that being is when you can separate that and you can, if you can sit and you can shut that off and just be if you just sit and experience everything that’s around you, um, kind of without sense, like, without touching or smelling, you, you just experience the world around you and appreciate it.
00:30:10:01 – 00:31:08:17
David Scofield
Um, that’s being, that’s, and obviously this spiritual teacher does a lot better job talking about that than me. But, uh, in that being and that’s, that being is, is in everything that’s in all of life, um, so with that said, so I have that you have that you know, our kids have that the uh, the, I don’t know all that everybody in the world that’s driving us all crazy or, you know, like whatever it is, they all have that same being, um, so really, the way I see it is, is what I’ve learned is that we are all we’re all the same brain.
00:31:08:19 – 00:31:38:24
David Scofield
We’re all, we’re all the same thing, just kind of programed differently. And I guess that’s, that’s a big thing that I’ve, that I’ve come to learn about my spirituality, that kindness and, and grace and and love can be extended to everyone and everything because it’s all we’re all I don’t know. We’re all the same.
00:31:39:18 – 00:31:55:21
Brad Singletary
How is that different from what you thought before or how was that a new I? It makes me want to I’ve seen and read some of his stuff, but I want to go learn more. I love what I have learned from him and watch some videos except he talks so slow. I had to turn it on like 1.5 or two to x, you know?
00:31:55:21 – 00:32:09:24
Brad Singletary
But how is that different? What? What was novel or new about that philosophy, about being and how we’re all the same kind of similar beings?
00:32:09:24 – 00:32:24:04
David Scofield
I guess in my past it’s been, um, it’s been separate. It’s been separated like we.
00:32:26:15 – 00:32:36:15
Brad Singletary
Separated, like based on your accomplishments or whether or not you were keeping the rules or your, the worth of your being was dictated on some other thing or.
00:32:36:17 – 00:33:02:16
David Scofield
Right. And yeah, in a lot of religion there’s like, are you worthy or, you know, worthy. Worthy of what? And what are the fuck are you talking about? Yeah. I don’t, it’s, yeah, that, that kind of stuff separated everybody. And then a lot of religions too. I’ve learned about a lot of them.
00:33:05:02 – 00:33:29:11
David Scofield
And in most cases it’s, you know, like, well, this is the this is the correct this is the right religion or the true religion or the this is the right God or, you know, all this other stuff is nonsense. And it’s not that’s not really the case. That’s all. To me, all of those things exist because we believe they exist.
00:33:29:11 – 00:33:51:05
David Scofield
They we think somebody thinks they exist. Therefore they do, because they’re not it’s not a tangible thing, but of a mass number of people are thinking of it or or believe in it or then then it’s there. You know, you can’t deny that. So it’s there for them. That’s very real. Yeah.
00:33:51:19 – 00:34:05:12
Brad Singletary
So I don’t know you saying that you learned a lot of this this year, but you weren’t seeking it, so you first had a question. So I love a whole lot about what you’re saying. You know, you kind of had some questions about what was it your asking about in the Facebook group?
00:34:05:12 – 00:34:07:02
David Scofield
It was it was self love.
00:34:07:02 – 00:34:09:19
Brad Singletary
Okay, How do I learn to love myself?
00:34:09:19 – 00:34:10:27
David Scofield
Yeah. Yeah.
00:34:10:29 – 00:34:12:27
Brad Singletary
So somebody turn you on to a book.
00:34:13:16 – 00:34:17:15
David Scofield
Totally by accident. Yeah, it was. It was a different book by a different author.
00:34:17:28 – 00:34:21:08
Brad Singletary
And I found it through the search of the wrong thing.
00:34:21:08 – 00:34:28:19
David Scofield
I found Eckhart totally. Okay. Yeah. Um, because that’s the author that he put out. Okay.
00:34:29:08 – 00:34:49:17
Brad Singletary
And so here’s I love about that. You have a question, So you’re wondering about being a better man. You’re wondering about how to love and appreciate yourself more, respect yourself more, whatever that was. And then you ask for some help. So resourcefulness is part of the man. That’s part of what you talk about. You always loved to learn.
00:34:49:17 – 00:35:05:24
Brad Singletary
You always want to be growing. You always want to learn new things. So then you ask other people, this Facebook group, you know, 15 or 1600 men from all over the world. And so you just throw it out there, Hey, how do I learn love myself more? So something along those lines, pretty much.
00:35:05:24 – 00:35:19:23
David Scofield
It was I mean, it was more drawn out than that. And and I’m a lot better I’m a lot better at writing something out. I can articulate what I’m trying to say better. But yeah, it was basically along those lines.
00:35:19:23 – 00:35:42:28
Brad Singletary
You threw it out there and but you’re seeking like the wisdom that other men might share. Some probably had all kinds of different ideas and thoughts, but that itself is bad ass that you’re asking for insight. Give me some wisdom to lead me to something of some understanding. You found this other stuff by accident. You go, you said devouring it or you were, you know, you spent a lot of time learning about his teachings.
00:35:43:05 – 00:35:43:19
David Scofield
Right.
00:35:43:24 – 00:36:00:17
Brad Singletary
And that’s changed you. And then what has how has that changed you since then? So I want to talk about some of the and things that you’ve done this year. But how does that make you see things differently just walking around in the world on a day to day basis?
00:36:00:17 – 00:36:35:14
David Scofield
I appreciate and I truly love all it’s hard to say, but it’s true. I love everything. You know, that’s that’s going on. I appreciate, you know, people experiences time that people put into stuff just there’s so much that goes into every single little thing that’s like in your life, every moment of your day. There’s so much shit that goes into that just aligns for that moment to happen.
00:36:36:02 – 00:37:19:25
David Scofield
And, and I, I try. It’s helped me try to appreciate every moment that I can. It’s helped me a lot with, with, with judgment of other people. I’ve always tried. No, maybe not always. I’ve tried to better myself with judgment of others and of myself. But, you know, when when I can look at everybody as, I mean, weird as the same thing, you know, the same we’re the same thing.
00:37:19:25 – 00:37:24:21
David Scofield
I can truly believe that. Everyone’s just they’re just doing their best. Could they do better? Hell, yeah.
00:37:25:20 – 00:37:45:01
Brad Singletary
So on the human part of that thing, you’re saying the human thing is like you’re tall and thin and I’m short and chubby, but our being is the same. So we have different we have these distinct differences in our human side. But the being that, you know, this whatever exists in us is the same is the same thing.
00:37:45:01 – 00:37:47:12
Brad Singletary
And maybe that’s a spiritual part or whatever.
00:37:47:12 – 00:38:21:13
David Scofield
Definitely it is. Yeah. And the human side is isn’t just physical. It’s it’s our thoughts. It’s our, um, it’s our thoughts and it’s our actions. It’s the things that we do. It’s how we get through life. Like, I mean, you’re a, you know, a lot of people have coping mechanisms that they have started when they were young and they don’t even know that they exist until they sit down with someone like you and kind of break things apart and and learn, Oh, I do this because of that.
00:38:21:13 – 00:38:28:21
David Scofield
Or I think this way, because of this experience or this number of experiences in my life. That’s our that’s our human side.
00:38:29:00 – 00:38:38:26
Brad Singletary
So the human part is whatever is unique to us individually, the beings side is what’s not unique. It’s we’re all we all have this common commonality.
00:38:38:29 – 00:38:52:02
David Scofield
Yeah, it’s it’s consciousness is what you know, Eckhart would Describe it as. It’s just it’s this consciousness that everything has just this existence.
00:38:53:19 – 00:39:20:29
Brad Singletary
Yeah, that’s great stuff. I love one of his quotes. Something about whatever the universe brings to you at any given time is exactly what is necessary for the evolution of your consciousness. Like whatever bullshit you run into, it’s good. It’s you need that. This is something meaningful for you. Take it and use it. And and of course, he’s much more like poetic about it all.
00:39:20:29 – 00:39:30:10
Brad Singletary
But I love that stuff, man. So you were talking about Grace a little bit. What are you. What are you talking about with talk about the concept of, like grace.
00:39:30:10 – 00:39:54:19
David Scofield
And so we go going with that. So like, I’ll, I’ll, I’ll look at my kids when they’re doing something wrong or, you know, they’re upsetting me and I don’t I don’t think of I don’t think less of them because they did something that you would expect a four year old to do, you know, or a two year old to do.
00:39:54:19 – 00:40:19:04
David Scofield
Like, of course, a two year old is going to throw a tantrum at some point. And, you know, a four year old is going to push her sister and take a toy or, you know, you know, I don’t think less of them. You know, you handle the situation and you help them learn through it and whatnot. But that to me is is having some having some grace for them.
00:40:19:04 – 00:40:33:01
David Scofield
Like, I’m not going to think less of you because you screw up. Um, and that extends to everybody. And then the hardest thing for me was was extending that to myself.
00:40:34:18 – 00:40:37:01
Brad Singletary
It’s easier extending grace to yourself.
00:40:37:05 – 00:40:59:07
David Scofield
Yeah. So having, you know, just knowing that it’s all right to do dumb shit, you know, I can. I can screw up and learn from it and keep going like you would like what you were just saying about Eckhart’s quote. Um, well, what did you say again?
00:40:59:12 – 00:41:07:06
Brad Singletary
Something like, you know, whatever the universe brings to you is exactly what your consciousness needs to evolve or something like that.
00:41:07:06 – 00:41:24:00
David Scofield
Right? So yeah, so all the, all the dumb stuff, all the, you know, all the great things and all the bad things and wonderful things and horrible things, and then everything in between is all helping us in some way. If you let it.
00:41:24:05 – 00:41:31:26
Brad Singletary
It’s all beneficial, as painful as it might be. Right? There’s some good in it. And let it, let it help you, Right.
00:41:32:01 – 00:41:32:12
David Scofield
Wow.
00:41:32:26 – 00:41:53:26
Brad Singletary
So, yeah, man, you’re talking about, you know, Grace for the four year old. She pushes her sister and whatever, and then and then to other people outside of your family, maybe. But then even to yourself, it seems like we spend so much of our thought, so much of our time thinking. We spend so much of it in judgment.
00:41:54:09 – 00:42:15:25
Brad Singletary
And that’s not very useful. I mean, so one of the red nine principles is discernment, which means, to be fair in your judgments, you know, see, read between the lines and see what’s going on and try to notice what’s reality. But that also might mean some greater depth to the person’s worth as a you know, the person’s like.
00:42:15:29 – 00:42:34:08
Brad Singletary
And when you’re talking about this being earlier, you were talking about in the religion, you know, the idea of worthiness, you’re saying there’s just this infinite worthiness. Everybody’s worthy. They’re the being. It can’t be changed. There’s no need to to prove yourself.
00:42:34:17 – 00:43:00:14
David Scofield
Right? Right. It’s just it’s just there. We we all have it, and it’s, uh, it’s mind blowing that. I mean, it’s. If you really think about it, it’s mind blowing that we even exist. Like what a what a crazy thing that is. And how. How grateful can you be that you can. They literally are just here. That I’m shit, that I’m here right now is insane.
00:43:00:14 – 00:43:05:20
David Scofield
But anywhere in the day, you know, just say you. I don’t know.
00:43:05:24 – 00:43:32:18
Brad Singletary
Yeah yeah the I think I’ve heard somewhere who quoted this with, you know it’s like a one in 4 trillion chance that you came to me that you and I came to exist one in 4 trillion. So there’s some meaningfulness to it all. And so one of those principles in the retina and we talk about reverence, and that is, you know, it’s often used in like, you know, in the religious world or whatever.
00:43:32:18 – 00:43:53:27
Brad Singletary
I think some pastors, even their title is like reverend, and it comes from the same word. And but the idea is just that there’s some humility. You got some gratitude. You know, you kind of see things as connected. You see life. You treat life with some respect. That’s what I you have a very strong sense of like reverence.
00:43:54:17 – 00:44:12:08
Brad Singletary
You know, I’ve seen your pictures of you out here on the strip or whatever in that banana suit. I saw you a zip line in naked. I’m pretty sure I tried to get that in the video, but it was to your skin blended in with the desert background. We couldn’t see it, but that was true. That showed.
00:44:12:28 – 00:44:17:03
David Scofield
Up in the air.
00:44:17:03 – 00:44:24:01
Brad Singletary
Coming down between the harness, you know, and ball sack everywhere. But you do, man. You got this this great sense of.
00:44:24:01 – 00:44:25:10
David Scofield
Like.
00:44:25:10 – 00:44:50:17
Brad Singletary
Just kindness, respect, humility, gratitude. That’s pretty awesome. So you went seeking that. You found you found some things that were helpful in your own understanding that. But but you know what, man? You before all that because some of your lifelong friends here in this in this video said they’ve known you since high school and you’ve just been a helpful dude all the way I mean, all the way through life.
00:44:50:17 – 00:45:10:25
Brad Singletary
Neighbors move in and you’re just showing up, offering to help with stuff. You know, here’s some tools here. What do you need? Let me help you out. Dave’s done things to help me. I mean, and so this isn’t just this year that you’ve been that guy. You’ve kind of been you’ve been shaping that part of you for a long time.
00:45:10:25 – 00:45:36:26
Brad Singletary
And and maybe some of that is just some inherent gifts that you have, I believe. But talk about just how you handle the people in your life. You know, the the neighbor, the coworker, the friend, the family member. Because surely people piss you off, but you’re giving a whole lot of good out there. You’re doing a lot of good.
00:45:36:26 – 00:46:20:19
David Scofield
Thanks. Yeah, I, I, I try. I think I think it was back when you, I think you had Justin Mackey right on on here and he spoke about relationships. Mm hmm. Um, and that’s, that’s what that is of. I’ve to me, relationships are uber important in, in life in general. And every relationship that I can, that I can have and help grow is, makes me better off.
00:46:20:19 – 00:46:49:24
David Scofield
And hopefully I can. I can make them better off as well. So that’s, that’s what that is as well. I’ll help whoever I can. And I think, I think helping people if I, I truly enjoy helping people and doing stuff for others. But it really does come back, you know, tenfold. The the more you do for for other people that you feel it right.
00:46:49:24 – 00:47:22:22
David Scofield
It feels good. But then somewhere down the road something pops up and you need some help and or, you know, someone offers you something or I don’t know I just I think relationships are super important in life because, I mean, it’s kind of the idea behind the Alpha Quorum race is we need tribe and the society that we live in now doesn’t really force us to create that tribe like it would have, you know, whatever thousand years ago.
00:47:22:22 – 00:47:47:01
David Scofield
But through trying to make these trying to trying to create and feed relationships, it creates that it creates your own kind of tribe. You you know, that those people can count on you. And a lot of the times you can count on those people.
00:47:47:28 – 00:48:09:24
Brad Singletary
I can just tell that that’s not your primary motivation. Otherwise, you know, that’s maybe manipulation or that’s a transactional relationship. You’re not doing that. You know, the guy your your dad was talking about where you’re going to dinner and somebody broke down and you whip around, make a U-turn and you know, you’re helping this guy. You’re supposed to be somewhere for a family dinner and you’re helping some guy on the side of the road.
00:48:10:01 – 00:48:22:15
Brad Singletary
That’s not he you probably not going to run into him again. You don’t need you’re not out there gathering credits for your future. And I don’t know how I know that. I just feel it. And I know that’s not what you’re doing.
00:48:23:01 – 00:48:59:20
David Scofield
Yeah, I guess maybe I was kind of. Maybe I’m. Maybe I’m wording that wrong or something. I just. It is about I think I really do think relationships are important, but I don’t have to receive from a relationship and situations like that. It’s just I don’t know. It just it, it feels right to go help somebody like some dude who is stuck in the middle of the street.
00:48:59:20 – 00:49:03:14
David Scofield
And poor guy was driving an old dodge, you know. So I. Oh, yeah, they.
00:49:04:06 – 00:49:04:28
Brad Singletary
All, they all need.
00:49:04:28 – 00:49:16:17
David Scofield
Help. Know how to get out and help them pushes Dodge and mentioned that it was a if it was a Chevy where you wanted to go but uh, yeah, I don’t know. Um.
00:49:17:00 – 00:49:18:29
Brad Singletary
Well, a worst case scenario would be a Ford, but.
00:49:19:11 – 00:49:19:17
David Scofield
Just.
00:49:19:25 – 00:49:20:15
Brad Singletary
Keep that out.
00:49:20:23 – 00:49:21:16
David Scofield
Okay? You know.
00:49:21:16 – 00:49:38:01
Brad Singletary
Keep it serious in our talk here. Well, yeah, man. So, like, you’re you’re you’re talking about, you’ve you’ve learned some language recently that says kind of we’re all the same, but you’ve been living that way. You’ve seen that’s what you would want to do. Somebody if, if you were stuck somewhere, if you were broken down, you would want that.
00:49:38:01 – 00:49:44:01
Brad Singletary
And so maybe part of it is, well, why not help this guy? Maybe it won’t take too much of my time. Did you ever make it to the dinner?
00:49:44:08 – 00:49:46:07
David Scofield
Yeah. Yeah, definitely.
00:49:46:14 – 00:49:49:10
Brad Singletary
And without too much, you know, grease on your hands or whatever.
00:49:49:12 – 00:49:54:01
David Scofield
No, I was. I was pretty gassed. Uh, that was a big, fat girl of a truck, so.
00:49:54:01 – 00:50:17:00
Brad Singletary
Oh, so you mentioned the. The interview with Justin Mackey, and I don’t know if he used this word in the podcast that he did a couple episodes with us or if it was in conversation outside of that. But he talked about I’d never heard this word before, but husbandry was like the art of, you know, being a husband, husbandry anyway, think is a great word.
00:50:17:00 – 00:50:37:26
Brad Singletary
I guess it’s a real word. Probably. He’s smarter than me. So talk about husbandry. Your role as a as a husband and how you, you know, some of the principles that you’re trying to live by, how that stuff shows up in your marriage. And I know I know your wife. I know Bri, and she seems like just a sweetheart.
00:50:37:26 – 00:50:47:13
Brad Singletary
And but I know when you’re when you’re dealing with human beings, when you’re dealing with feelings, when you’re dealing with a long term relationship, things probably creep in. And, you know, we’re all human.
00:50:48:16 – 00:51:04:20
David Scofield
Right, man, to be it, to be a husband, to be in a in a marriage, you kind of a I feel like I kind of grew up thinking that it’s one thing and actually having no idea what the hell it actually was.
00:51:04:20 – 00:51:05:00
Brad Singletary
We all.
00:51:05:00 – 00:51:07:12
David Scofield
Got to do it in.
00:51:07:18 – 00:51:08:06
Brad Singletary
Fantasy.
00:51:08:14 – 00:51:42:15
David Scofield
Yeah. Yeah. We don’t you don’t know until you do it and the biggest thing with trying to to be a good husband currently and be better as I go is again, I’m constantly I think it’s important to try to learn. Um, there’s always room to grow, right? And I don’t know, I just. I really try to be there for her.
00:51:42:15 – 00:52:07:25
David Scofield
I try to support her in, in a lot of things. Um, but I, I learn a lot from her. She’s, she’s the first person in my life that has ever, like, any, any wild ass idea that I have or stupid thing that I want to do or whatever. She just it, she’s like, Yeah, go ahead. And that is huge.
00:52:07:25 – 00:52:34:19
David Scofield
And so I think that part of being a good husband is also is I mean, there’s been a lot of guys that have talked on, on this podcast about that kind of stuff. But for me, a huge thing is, is learning from your spouse, not just learning like, you know, what are they what do they need in, in your relationship or or how can you help them and do all this stuff.
00:52:34:19 – 00:52:50:00
David Scofield
But learning from them, like using them as an example to also be better? Mm hmm. Um, and I, I try my best, you know, to do that with. With my wife.
00:52:50:27 – 00:53:17:07
Brad Singletary
Yeah, there’s some. I think this was some research out of Australia. I’m not sure who who has this. Maybe it’s the Guardians. I’m not sure, but somebody out there, somebody famous is talking about. The fact that the happiest relationships are literally where the man is, where the husband is, he allows himself to be influenced by his spouse. So the worst relationships are where the man does not have any.
00:53:17:15 – 00:53:33:23
Brad Singletary
He won’t allow any. He won’t allow himself to learn from her. And you’re saying you’re you’re allowing yourself to learn. There’s a lot to learn. There’s there’s a lot going on in life. And you’re allowing her to influence you. So she’s supportive, but she’s also teaching you and.
00:53:34:03 – 00:54:00:14
David Scofield
Right. And I think that’s that balance is important because she is very supportive. Um, so I know I’m not just like, you know, being taken advantage of, although honestly, today before I came over here, um, I, I told her, you know what? I don’t, I don’t really enjoy or like the fact that I am as trained as I am because she might.
00:54:00:14 – 00:54:22:09
David Scofield
My two year old went over and dumped a bunch of just went over and dumped the dog water all over the floor. And my wife and I are both sitting on the couch and she saw it happen and I was kind of staring off into my phone and she saw it happen. And she said something along the lines of did did just dump the dog water.
00:54:22:26 – 00:54:42:28
David Scofield
And I looked up and I see the dog water spilled on the floor and like, without anything just like stood up. And it takes all energy to clean this shit up. And I don’t know, but she does the same thing too. So that is I’ve learned from her, but I don’t know, maybe I’ve been programed by her too.
00:54:44:10 – 00:55:03:01
Brad Singletary
Man, there was a moment, and maybe it’s because I’m looking at this. When I was doing this video right at the very end, when she said, There is no one more deserving of this award, and I’m very proud of her. Now, I don’t know her that well, but I think I know people well enough and I’ve got this on my earphones.
00:55:03:01 – 00:55:23:11
Brad Singletary
I’m playing the same clips, you know, 40 times each to get it. All right. And I just hear this little bit of emotion. I hear this little bit of just excitement that she is truly proud of you, man. Like I it was just giddy. She was trying not to be to look too. But she was saying there’s no one more deserving of this.
00:55:23:11 – 00:55:34:20
Brad Singletary
And I’m very proud of him. And I don’t know, I just I believed her. I believe that that was a deep appreciation for you when she said that. I just maybe others didn’t catch that. But do you think she’s proud of you?
00:55:34:27 – 00:56:01:00
David Scofield
Absolutely I do. Yeah, I think I think we’re both proud of each other. We’re both growing and learning and and it’s you can’t you can’t help but feel proud of of your spouse when when you’re paying attention to their growth. You know, I think how now they’re doing.
00:56:01:00 – 00:56:17:04
Brad Singletary
Wow, that’s cool. You can’t help but to be proud of your spouse if you’re paying attention to their growth. That that may be the problem with a lot of men is that they’re not paying attention. They’re not looking at men and women, too. But if you’re paying attention, you’re probably going to be proud.
00:56:17:27 – 00:56:20:14
David Scofield
Right? Wow. Yeah.
00:56:20:15 – 00:56:42:12
Brad Singletary
I see you guys doing like music festivals. And, you know, I know you both have great careers, but maybe, maybe you’re not, like, infinitely loaded with cash or whatever, but you make things a priority. You’re doing trips, you’re traveling, you’re taking a little weekend getaways. You got you’re going to concerts and you’re just you seem like you’re just living life together and making it making it work.
00:56:42:12 – 00:56:45:20
Brad Singletary
I mean, it just seems like you’re kind of living the American dream.
00:56:46:13 – 00:56:53:17
David Scofield
Making it work. Yeah, that’s definitely that’s it right there. I don’t know. Yeah, we’re doing our best for sure.
00:56:54:19 – 00:57:12:09
Brad Singletary
There’s a couple other things I wanted to mention. So you did a you did two huge things this year. Talk about heroes on the water, because we talked about the mental health and the we’ll talk about the whole program and your involvement with it and why you did it.
00:57:12:23 – 00:57:42:29
David Scofield
Here is on the water is a I’m super excited about and blessed to be able to be a part of here in Vegas. So Heroes on the Water is a organization. It’s a it’s a nonprofit organization that’s all over the U.S. And we were able to get a chapter started here in Las Vegas. And what we do is provide like a day of fishing.
00:57:43:12 – 00:58:11:17
David Scofield
We take people out, we’ve got kayaks, we got kayaks, trailer, fishing gear, a bunch of cool stuff. And we take veterans active duty and first responders and, their family, and we organize little events and get everybody out on the water to go fishing. Just a it’s the slogan for heroes on the water is paddle fish.
00:58:11:17 – 00:58:14:05
Brad Singletary
He’ll paddle fishy or that’s awesome.
00:58:14:05 – 00:58:39:17
David Scofield
And it’s something that I’ve found in my life that helps me out a lot. And I know it’s helped a ton of other people out and just, I don’t know, like what we were talking about before, kind of connecting with nature and getting your mind focused on something else and and a million other reasons that it’s good. But yeah, we’ve got some we’ve got some good plans for it this year.
00:58:39:17 – 00:59:03:03
David Scofield
We didn’t we didn’t do a ton with it last year. I think we well we got our three outings done last year. Um, one of them I was able to get a group of firefighters from here in Vegas. We went out to, we actually went out to a frigate, I think it was Gun Lake Reservoir out in Utah and did some fishing out there.
00:59:03:03 – 00:59:24:21
David Scofield
The guys had a blast. Most of them hadn’t really fished and I don’t know, they loved it. They had a good time. And that’s that’s really what it’s about, getting people out to go get away from especially jobs like that that are pretty mentally taxing. Um, trying to serve the guys and the men and men and women that serve us.
00:59:25:10 – 00:59:25:23
David Scofield
So.
00:59:26:14 – 00:59:40:02
Brad Singletary
Yeah. So what was your involvement with that? I mean, this is a nonprofit that exists out there with chapters all over and whatever. It didn’t exist in Nevada, right? Until you got involved in what was your how did you how did you do your part of that?
00:59:40:13 – 01:00:19:10
David Scofield
So I guess it did kind of exist in Nevada. But the last director wasn’t I don’t know, I guess I don’t know the full story of it. Nobody knew about it and they weren’t doing any events or anything. So I probably got busy with life and whatnot, but I heard that they wanted to start a chapter here and just I reached out to a bunch of people and finally got a hold of someone that was in charge of getting chapters off the ground.
01:00:20:11 – 01:00:29:29
David Scofield
Um, and so, yeah, so we started the, we started the chapter out here.
01:00:29:29 – 01:00:53:04
Brad Singletary
It’s just remarkable, man. People don’t do that. I mean, people like that. And that’s the kind of thing that this guy is, you know, I think you got some opposite work schedules with your wife. You know, you spend a lot of time with your two very young daughters. You’ve got your own full time work, you’ve got your own hobbies, you’ve got all these friends you’re taking care of, even strangers on the side of the road.
01:00:53:11 – 01:01:14:24
Brad Singletary
And then it’s like, Hey, let me start a nonprofit here in Nevada for the veterans. And first responders. You know, take them out fishing, paddle, fish, heal. Good grief, man. That’s just that’s the most impressive thing ever. So this is all about kind of mental health and healing from traumatic experiences. I mean, that’s part of their, like mission statement or something about.
01:01:14:24 – 01:01:46:04
David Scofield
Yeah, that’s a lot of it. Um, it also recognizes that the families deal with that too. Like, um, you know, people, people, men and women coming back from deployment and, and stuff, they’re, you know, a lot of times are different when you get home, Um, therapy, first responders, they see the wildest stuff, you know, they deal with some crazy stuff and then they got to go home to their families.
01:01:46:04 – 01:02:06:08
David Scofield
And, you know, it’s hard for them. But, you know, there’s probably some distancing and stuff with family and whatnot. So it lets their family come out as well. And let’s people let’s let’s the families connect and do something fun together and just kind of provides the vehicle for them to do that.
01:02:06:08 – 01:02:08:07
Brad Singletary
So you are a veteran yourself?
01:02:08:17 – 01:02:09:13
David Scofield
Yeah. Yeah.
01:02:10:11 – 01:02:17:29
Brad Singletary
I had the hardest time getting information about that, but I’m curious, so you served in the Air Force? Yep. And you went overseas. You?
01:02:18:28 – 01:02:51:00
David Scofield
Yeah, I did. Um, I did a year, uh, in Korea. Um, and then, uh, let’s see, I was in, I was in Phenix, and then I went to Korea for a year, and then I was at Moody Air Force Base in Georgia, where I had the chance to deploy with the combat search and rescue guys. I’m not half as bad ass as any of those guys, but I was.
01:02:51:00 – 01:03:03:20
David Scofield
I got to go with them in support of them. Um, and so, yeah, deployed to Afghanistan and uh, had some wild experiences out there.
01:03:03:20 – 01:03:09:13
Brad Singletary
And what year was that like, where was that in terms of the whole war and everything? What about what you.
01:03:09:13 – 01:03:15:13
David Scofield
Were that I was in Afghanistan in 2011. Wow.
01:03:16:19 – 01:03:24:12
Brad Singletary
So you were just young if you’re 34 now, that was like 12 years ago. You were pretty young, pretty young guy at that point.
01:03:24:17 – 01:03:31:06
David Scofield
Yeah, I think I was for 21, 22, 22, maybe 23.
01:03:31:07 – 01:03:35:14
Brad Singletary
Would you would you recommend the military? I mean, if a young man is interested and would you.
01:03:36:28 – 01:03:37:02
David Scofield
You.
01:03:37:02 – 01:03:40:28
Brad Singletary
Can’t see this because we’re not filming it, but his eyes just got really big and.
01:03:41:13 – 01:04:00:19
David Scofield
Oh man, I think it’s I what you need to understand about the military is that it’s not, uh, it’s not a job. This is. It’s the military is a life. And that’s a hard thing for a lot of people. It was hard for me.
01:04:00:19 – 01:04:07:19
Brad Singletary
You’ve got responsibilities. Even when you’re not like, on the job. You it it’s. It’s all day and night for years of your life.
01:04:07:25 – 01:04:36:14
David Scofield
Yeah. And they move you wherever they want. And. And you know, you’re, you’re, you’re a tool for the, for the government. So it’s, I mean if you understand that and you want to go do it and you want to, you know, go fight for freedom or, you know, whatever have you, a lot of guys I remember just joined so that they could get the benefits, you know, and that’s another thing.
01:04:36:14 – 01:05:18:18
David Scofield
Sure. Um, I would only recommend the military to certain kinds of people. And if I do recommend the military to anybody, I definitely recommend the Air Force. Um, just being in it. I know everybody talks shit about the Air Force because you call Air Force the Air Force. Um, but the reality was that being in the Air Force, you are treated better than the Army guys were treated or the Marines were treated and, um, as far as military goes, like we had been in the Air Force, you’ve got it pretty cut.
01:05:19:12 – 01:05:38:25
David Scofield
And so if you want to go, do it. Smart and join the military, then you want to join the Air Force. If anything, I think unless you want to. I don’t know. That totally depends on somebody wants, you know, what do they want to go after? So he wants to go be an infantryman. And you know, you’re going to you’re going to fucking go through it.
01:05:38:25 – 01:05:42:21
David Scofield
But yeah, if that’s what you want to do send it, I.
01:05:43:07 – 01:05:51:28
Brad Singletary
I saw you on one of the pictures there. You’re like laying on top of this huge, like bomb or something. I was just like, Oh, I bet that wasn’t authorized.
01:05:51:28 – 01:05:55:01
David Scofield
Yeah, Yeah, that was when planking was.
01:05:55:14 – 01:05:57:15
Brad Singletary
Oh, yeah, that’s what it was all about.
01:05:57:20 – 01:06:03:05
David Scofield
Planking on stuff. Yeah. So I just laid on a is a big practice. Bones. Uh.
01:06:04:06 – 01:06:26:01
Brad Singletary
So military veteran you care about, you know, the mental health of first responders and veterans were instrumental in creating this Heroes on the water. You also did something this year that was super cool. And I want to know how you how this came about. This car show. So this was like an assisted living facility or something. And you arranged like this car parade.
01:06:26:01 – 01:06:44:09
Brad Singletary
And there’s one of the pictures in there where there’s all these guys wheelchairs. You know, these guys look like they’re, you know, 80, 90 years old or something. And they’re sort of waving at the at the the shovels and the mustangs driving by or whatever they were. And what how did that come to be?
01:06:44:21 – 01:07:16:06
David Scofield
That was that was super cool. I’m glad I got to do that. And we actually are doing a, uh, a men’s group at that assisted living. How are you freaking serious as well? So we’ll do a monthly we’re doing a monthly men’s group there. So the guys so that came about because, um, I’m going to sound kind of silly, but I was, I was listening to a podcast and it was Gary, it was Gary Vee.
01:07:16:06 – 01:07:48:11
David Scofield
I was listening to a Gary Vee podcast and he mentioned, um, go volunteer at a retirement, a retirement home or assisted living home or something along those lines. Go volunteer there and experience and people that are very aware that they’re at the end of their life. That’s the harsh reality of it. You know, that’s they know that, right?
01:07:48:14 – 01:08:12:28
David Scofield
We all know that. Um, a good experience. People that are, that are at that stage in life and and you can you can gain a lot from that you learn lessons from those people and and because they they just have so much more experience in life than we do or than I do right now. You know I’ve got my 30 years compared to their 8590.
01:08:13:21 – 01:08:46:09
David Scofield
So that’s why I seek it out. I was like, okay, yeah, sure, I’ll go, Why not? Um, and I got a hold of a place is assisted living. So there’s differences, right, between retirement homes and assisted living homes. And then there’s other stuff too, that are a lot more intense. So assisted living homes are for people that cannot get through their day without some sort of help.
01:08:46:17 – 01:08:54:12
David Scofield
Mm hmm. And then you have more intense stuff where, like, everybody’s got dementia and stuff, like the.
01:08:54:12 – 01:08:57:25
Brad Singletary
Nursing home is missing or way more severe cases.
01:08:57:25 – 01:09:00:13
David Scofield
But right. So this is kind of a in between.
01:09:01:08 – 01:09:03:17
Brad Singletary
Yeah, it looks like an apartment, kind of almost or something.
01:09:03:17 – 01:09:29:26
David Scofield
Yeah, they’ve got like dorms and, and whatnot. But so in going they’re talking to their, um, director, their activities director talking to her. And this was before Father’s Day or something. It was, it was the month before Father’s Day. And she asked me if I had any idea. She’s like, Look, I’m a I’m a, you know, I, I like to do activities and whatnot.
01:09:29:26 – 01:10:19:22
David Scofield
And this is this is my job. So I do. But it’s hard for me to think about stuff for for the guys, for the men. Like, do you have any ideas for these guys? And that’s how it all kind of came to be. I went down there to go talk about times that I could call bingo numbers and it turned into, okay, yeah, let me think of some cool ideas and activities, activities that were more focused on the more focused on the men in in the home, because so through that and talking to some of the people that are there, some of the men that are there, you learn that these guys have done like
01:10:19:25 – 01:10:50:01
David Scofield
it an 80 year old, you know, 85 year old man was around in World War two. And like, I’m I’m talking to guys in this home that are that there’s this one guy that will just forever be in my head, just happy as hell, a real cool dude and real energetic. And he, uh, he was a he was a dive bomber in World War Two.
01:10:50:02 – 01:11:22:11
David Scofield
This man was just dive bombing Nazi ships and the guys here have done really bad stuff. They’ve all done really cool. Like they’ve had a lot of cool life experience and they’ve now they’re in this assisted living home where, like, you know, they can go to a Walmart and like peruse around Walmart once a week and they have like bingo nights and paint nights and, and stuff like this.
01:11:22:11 – 01:11:34:27
David Scofield
And, um, so when she asked me about ideas for men, you know, that got me thinking about, well, what would be it was something I want to do because they’re, they’re no different. Right right.
01:11:34:29 – 01:11:35:26
Brad Singletary
They were all the same.
01:11:35:26 – 01:12:01:15
David Scofield
Shit And I have like, let’s give them, let’s think of something cool for them to experience, to do. So that’s the, the car show thing came up through that and, uh, yeah, I don’t know. Just brought it up to her and I actually brought it up to the Alpha Forum Group. A bunch of the guys in the group came up with some other ideas that we’re going to, you know, that we’ll do for the men’s group.
01:12:02:00 – 01:12:26:18
David Scofield
Um, but it was that was, that was a real cool thing to put together and, and I guess resourcefulness and relationships really came into play with that because I just reached out to anybody. I knew that because I never put on a car show. I don’t know, like I’m not even a huge car guy, like, I like, I love cars, trucks, all that stuff.
01:12:26:18 – 01:12:55:00
David Scofield
But if, if, uh, I don’t know, some classic car drives in front of me, I can name like four or five, you know, but I probably won’t know the year, you know. So just reaching out to people and, and got that, uh, and it was a bunch of people wanting to volunteer their time to, uh, go hang out in a parking lot because it’s really all a car show is, it’s just like, let’s all get our cars together and talk.
01:12:55:10 – 01:13:12:22
David Scofield
And what better thing for a, for a assisted living home to go see all these cars that you, um, Grandma probably did some wild stuff with grandpa in the back of one of those cars, too, You know, just bring some fun memories.
01:13:12:22 – 01:13:19:03
Brad Singletary
These were the hot rods when they were young and stuff. Yeah. That’s so awesome. So how many cars is the end up having there? And do you remember how many?
01:13:19:06 – 01:13:29:23
David Scofield
Oh, I don’t even know. Probably probably somewhere around 20, 30 cars.
01:13:29:23 – 01:13:58:14
Brad Singletary
Dude, that is so cool. So see that I you as you’re talking, I’m remembering something that Taco Mike said I forget what what episode but he but he basically said if you’re not leading out and doing something awesome, you’re missing out. You’re missing out on opportunity. You’re missing out on like, blessing other people’s lives. And here you you’re arranging and helping helping this thing come together because you listen to a podcast, you’re looking for things.
01:13:58:14 – 01:14:16:01
Brad Singletary
You’re looking for inspiration out there. You’re trying to you’re trying to learn about life. Someone suggests it. Go spend time with people that are at the end of their life. And you said, okay, sounds cool. I’ll do. I think that could do for me. So you go out there and you end up spending all this energy and effort to take care of someone else.
01:14:16:13 – 01:14:45:11
Brad Singletary
So not only was this good for the old man and the wheelchairs and then this facility this is good for the people who have the cars. You’ve got 20 or 30 people now. They’re invested in sacrificing time and they probably loved it because they like to show off their, you know, their hotrod, Ford, whatever. And they get to come there and maybe meet with some of their friends and people that they know, the people in the facility, you know, the staff members kind of get a little break maybe because you’re out there kind of handling them for a while.
01:14:45:19 – 01:14:56:02
Brad Singletary
Now that’s turned into something else. Oh, I remember when we announced your Man of the Year award, someone on the Facebook group said he works with you out there. Yeah. Nathan Something, I think. Nathan.
01:14:56:02 – 01:15:04:07
David Scofield
Nathan. Uh, man, I got to feel like a jerk. I think it is. Nathan. Jay Sort of the Jay Forgive me.
01:15:04:07 – 01:15:05:27
Brad Singletary
Jacobson Or something like that, or.
01:15:06:22 – 01:15:32:27
David Scofield
I believe so. Jackson Jason Don’t know. Sorry, man. I know he was. He was super cool. He reached out to me and asked if there’s any way he could help and and so he came out and he helped me with he was actually super cool because I was running all over the place and, you know, and talking to people and like, trying to park people and then trying to get people outside.
01:15:32:27 – 01:15:53:12
David Scofield
And, you know, I was all over the place talking with the director and yada, yada and. He was he was really is super cool to watch because he would go and like someone in a wheelchair, you know, he’d go grab a wheelchair and okay, you know what? What kind of cars out here do you remember? What do you what do you like to see?
01:15:53:12 – 01:16:06:27
David Scofield
What do you want to go check out or whatever it will somebody around chat with them, take pictures with them, forum yada, yada, and then bring them back inside and grab somebody else. And this is super cool to see that. Yeah.
01:16:06:28 – 01:16:11:03
Brad Singletary
Oh, that’s great, man. That’s just, you know.
01:16:12:11 – 01:16:12:17
David Scofield
It.
01:16:13:12 – 01:16:46:25
Brad Singletary
Even before this year. It sounds like you were the type of man who’s just, you know, really worthy of recognition. You’re always just taking care of people, really putting yourself maybe last. I mean, I know it’s it’s it, you know, you’re okay to take a week off work and go out of state with the family and, you know, do some fun things that you enjoy and you don’t mind, you know, spend a little money on yourself, have a have a good time and kind of entertain your wife and and get out there and and enjoy life with so much of your time.
01:16:46:25 – 01:17:07:23
Brad Singletary
Is focused on other people, I’m just convinced that like selflessness and service, that is what’s missing in a lot of men’s lives. Know we’re so self-absorbed, we can think ourselves a victim. We can think, poor me, look at all this stuff that’s happening. Look at what the government is doing. Look at the taxes I have to pay. Look at all this garbage that’s going on.
01:17:07:23 – 01:17:36:04
Brad Singletary
Look at all this political shit. Look at you know how my way is treating me. Look at how my wife isn’t coming through for me. Look at look at all these things. We’ve not talked about any of that. We’re talking about you making decisions, taking action, removing obstacles, work, you know, making incremental improvements. You went from car show to now a recurring men’s group at a place where the men are dying.
01:17:36:04 – 01:17:38:20
Brad Singletary
We’re all we’re all we’re all headed that way anyway.
01:17:39:03 – 01:17:39:13
David Scofield
Right.
01:17:40:04 – 01:17:54:04
Brad Singletary
My man? You’ve got like, you know, you’re 34. Let’s say you’ve got 60 years left. What else you want to do, man? What else? What other kinds of things do you want in your future? And and we’ll wrap this up here.
01:17:54:04 – 01:18:23:22
David Scofield
Um, I don’t know. I, uh. I think I. I just kind of want to continue on the path I’m on and kind of see where it takes me. I guess I’m not. I don’t want to get too wrapped up in the could bes and maybes and in the future. And I really just want to focus on now, you know, that’s great.
01:18:24:02 – 01:18:47:23
Brad Singletary
I’m that kind of person that I can get too carried away with some ideal or some, you know, fantasy thing that I want to do or accomplish and and not live enough in the here and now and in the present. And you’ve just shown that you have this incredible I know you’re not perfect. I know there are things that you probably wouldn’t want people to know about in your life.
01:18:47:23 – 01:19:10:03
Brad Singletary
You know, things that might be embarrassing, things you’re working on, things you’re always trying to improve, but damn, you’re doing good in the world. You know, people that know you the best, they just. They love you to death. You’re just a good, good man. We talk about, you know, an alpha No one really is is an identified alpha.
01:19:10:13 – 01:19:54:04
Brad Singletary
You do alpha. You know, when you’re arranging a big party for old men, that’s some alpha shit. You know, when you’re putting together a nonprofit and organizing an organization here for veterans and people that need healing, and you’re taking people that have never faced much out onto the water, helping them have an experience. You know, when you’re dressing up in a unicorn costume with your daughters, when you are slack lighting or high lighting, when you’re, you know, enjoying music at a festival, um, you’ve done wild and crazy things, too.
01:19:54:14 – 01:20:17:25
Brad Singletary
Those are just alpha moments that you’re just accumulating and you’re just taking advantage of opportunities. We talk about attitude, actions and attributes, and I think the attributes kind of come as a result of attitude and your actions. And what I’ve seen from you, man, I’ve known you for a few years now. What I’ve seen from that is just that it’s just stellar in every way.
01:20:17:25 – 01:20:39:25
Brad Singletary
I’ve been inspired by you. I’ve learned from you. You’re creating a little ripples out there that are just never ending. It’s just never going to end. You’re putting together, you’re putting together that strength, other people’s lives. And I’m just very, very proud to know you. It makes me want to be better. You’re like way younger than me, way better looking.
01:20:39:25 – 01:21:09:06
Brad Singletary
It’s inspiring. It’s inspiring to just to know somebody who’s getting after it. But you’re not all about you’re not even really all about. You’re not you’re not showing off. This is just you understanding the thing about being that we’re all the same, that we’re carrying something inside us. All that is that’s from the same place. It’s from the same material.
01:21:09:06 – 01:21:28:01
Brad Singletary
It’s the same substance exists in all of us. And that’s why you can help the old, you know, the old retired man. That’s why you can, you know, sacrifice some of your time, Just give so much. So in just a small, silly token of appreciation, we’ve got a little bit of swag here for you. A t shirt, a hat.
01:21:28:27 – 01:21:50:27
Brad Singletary
We’ve got this awesome little trophy sort of award. I want to pull it out of this and show you to it is kind of fragile. I dropped when Taco Mike won this, I dropped it and it cracks easy. So you just got to be careful with it. Put it up somewhere safe. But Man of the Year 2022. David Schofield That thing is, I love the look of that.
01:21:50:27 – 01:21:51:15
Brad Singletary
It just kind of.
01:21:51:29 – 01:21:52:23
David Scofield
Yeah, that’s awesome.
01:21:52:23 – 01:22:12:14
Brad Singletary
It just it’s just black. I’ll put a picture of it up. It’s a little black kind of black thing that he’s got his name engraved in there and then some of the African imagery and, and then this, this had this is one of my favorite new designs here is no excuses alpha up. Yeah. And it’s and even if it’s upside down, it’s the same thing.
01:22:12:20 – 01:22:13:25
David Scofield
Oh, yeah, that’s cool.
01:22:14:23 – 01:22:18:08
Brad Singletary
So if you ever get flipped over in your ATV, either.
01:22:18:10 – 01:22:18:16
David Scofield
You.
01:22:20:20 – 01:22:41:09
Brad Singletary
Don’t know what you represent, dude. Davis, Scofield, man, appreciate his go. You’re just a hell of a man. Somebody that inspires me. I really appreciate you coming down after a long week. A long drive yesterday, helping a friend out earlier. Getting here right on time. Just reliable, as always. And I’m just. I feel like my life is better because I’m associated with you.
01:22:41:09 – 01:22:42:19
Brad Singletary
So I really appreciate you, dude.
01:22:42:19 – 01:23:14:09
David Scofield
I appreciate it. And then honestly, the same goes for you. Goes for goes for a lot of this group. But yeah, I’ve I’ve learned a lot, a lot from you and I don’t know that I wouldn’t be where I’m at, honestly, without you, Mike and a lot of the other guys in this group, and I do want to I do want to recognize that most of the guys in our group probably deserve this.
01:23:14:09 – 01:23:36:14
David Scofield
I don’t, I don’t feel like I deserve this award or this recognition or whatever more than anybody else. I think that I think a lot of people deserve it. And equally, I’m proud of a lot of people out there and I don’t know and grateful for for the example that everybody else has set.
01:23:36:20 – 01:23:57:23
Brad Singletary
So I forgot to mention before that SCO also had a podcast before, and that was kind of inspirational to me too, to meet him. And we talked early on I mean, years ago, I mean, three or four years ago, it was about some of the little tips and things. And he’s you know, we talked about sound quality and a lot of things that he had worked out that I hadn’t.
01:23:57:23 – 01:24:15:22
Brad Singletary
And I believe that we’re going to have you on here a whole lot more. And I hope I wish you didn’t live on the other side of the planet from me down here in Henderson. But I’m looking forward to just continuing to learn from you, man, and just see what see how, you know, we can help each other and help other men.
01:24:15:22 – 01:24:38:19
Brad Singletary
So I really appreciate it. You guys, when you have an opportunity to show some love, when you have an opportunity to give and to serve and to be engaged and have a good attitude, take advantage of it. People are going to notice you’re going to have an opportunity to create never ending cycles of good, because can influence your own children.
01:24:38:19 – 01:24:49:14
Brad Singletary
You can influence your wife, be influenced by her people, you work with people around you. So follow the example of David Schofield and have no excuses. Alpha up.
01:24:50:23 – 01:25:02:08
Intro/Outro
Gentlemen, you are the alpha and this is the alpha quorum.
