MOTION, EMOTION & ENERGY – Alpha Energy with Joshua Roy
You’ve never seen a person of tremendous influence who didn’t have some sense of control over their energy. The most influential people in your life have carried themselves with unmistakable vitality and positivity. Those high-value qualities are generated in our minds and bodies. An ALPHA is a man of energy. If his mission is to have life, create life in himself and others, and preserve life, he must be focused on the needs of his body and use it as a machine that helps him deliver high-level power into his daily life and share contagious power with those in his influence. How a man manages the care of his physical machine is a predictor of his successes with everything and everyone with which he is involved.
Questions answered on this episode:
- What are some of the challenges you have faced as a man, and what has been most helpful in recovering from those difficulties?
- Why do we sabotage ourselves and how can we kind of work through that habit?
- What drags us down?
- How can a man create positive energy with his thoughts?
- How can a man create positive energy with his words?
- How can a man create positive energy with his movements?
Thoughts to Ponder:
“There are two fundamental thoughts that just about everyone on the planet has, in fact, I’d say everybody on the planet has, so every listener here has these two thoughts. It’s universal. The first one is I’m not enough. The second one is, if I’m not enough, I won’t be loved.”
“Depression makes us shrink. Depression makes us want to be small and unseen. We try and slink into the background, whereas someone who’s energetic and full of life, the alpha that you’re talking about, he’s out there. His chest is up. His chin is up. He’s looking in at an elevated level. His eyes are up. He’s feeling good about himself. He’s walking on his toes. He’s not dragging himself around.”
“You and I have a choice, what are we going to do with our words? Are we going to use them in positive ways? Are we going to repair ourselves by asking better questions and by speaking in more positive ways? Or are we gonna do the reverse?”
– Joshua Roy
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Brad Singletary (00:00:00):
You’ve never seen a person of tremendous influence who didn’t have some sense of control over their energy. The most influential people in your life have carried themselves with unmistakable vitality and positivity. Those high-value qualities are generated in our minds, in our bodies. And alpha is a man of energy. If his mission is to have life, create life in himself and others and preserve life, he must be focused on the needs of his body and use it as a machine that helps him deliver high level power into his daily life and share contagious power. With those in his influence, how a man manages the care of his physical machine is a predictor of his successes with everything and everyone with which he is involved.
If you’re a man that controls his own destiny, a man that is always in the pursuit of being better. You are in the right place. You are responsible, you are strong, you are a leader. You are a force for good gentlemen. You are the alpha, and this is the Alpha Quorum.
Joshua Roy (00:01:19):
Pumped up to get the energy off. So before I do a coaching session, that’s what I’ll do. I’ll go into the back room, just going to get myself all pumped and then I’ll come out nice and relaxed, but the energy is high.
Brad Singletary (00:01:39):
Welcome back to the Alpha Quorum show. Brad Singletary here, you guys, I’m super excited today because of a few different things going on. Number one, this is only our second video session that we’re going to attempt to put this together in video form. Also our guest today, who was a special person to me, I’m going to introduce him more fully here in just a minute, but he is coming to us from Queensland Australia today. We’ve known each other for about 25 years. He’s an international speaker and a life coach with access world seminars. His full-time day job is working as a police Sergeant in Brisbane, Queensland, Australia, but he’s conducted over 300 seminars and workshops with an international audience on taking control of the unconscious mind, values, relationships, rapport building, influence, neuro-linguistic programming techniques, including anchoring parts, integration, strategic visioning, swish pattern, and many more. He helps people deal with anxiety and depression. He’s conducted over 1000 coaching sessions and has a completely booked schedule with his coaching clients. He runs meetups in Australia, as well as Chicago, Philadelphia, and New York. Gentlemen, please welcome to the show, Joshua Roy, thanks for being here, brother.
Joshua Roy (00:03:00):
Hey, nice to be here. I’m really excited of this.
Brad Singletary (00:03:03):
So it’s been like 25 years since we’ve had a, an actual conversation we’ve caught up on social media and we’ve watched each other’s and listened to some of each other’s material, but this is our first conversation since about 1998.
Joshua Roy (00:03:18):
Absolutely. And look, I’ve, I’ve loved watching what the Alpha Quorum is doing and you know, I’ve listened to many of your podcasts and I’ve I’ve really enjoyed the quality of the content that you put out. So it’s been, it’s been really good for me.
Brad Singletary (00:03:32):
Well. You’re becoming a part of that now, because you’re going to share some serious wisdom with us today. I’ve watched what you’ve been doing as well, some of your videos and I would like to participate more in that. So I’m, I’m hoping to get a better introduction to some of that today, but I just wanted to talk about how Joshua and I know each other. So in 1996, I was a missionary for my church and I was sent to Perth, Australia. So Perth is kind of the Southern California of Australia, kind of in the Southwest corner. And I was there, you know, it was, I left here. It was February. So I left here. It was snowy and winter. And I went down under, into the Southern hemisphere and it was summertime there February summer. So I get there and it’s probably, I mean, scorching hot.
Brad Singletary (00:04:23):
So I’m riding around on a bicycle with a white shirt and tie, of course, the name badge and kind of sticking out like a sore thumb already. Well, my companion here Joshua tells me that I need to identify myself as an American so that people could, because they drive on the other side of the street there. And so he had me attach this yellow plate onto the front and back of my bike and it, and it was a yellow plate with a black L and I said, what is this about? And he said, oh, it’s it means left-hand driver. And just to identify to the Australians that maybe this guy is going to turn in front of you and just be, be on the lookout because maybe he doesn’t know which way the traffic is coming from. So I did this for a couple of weeks and everywhere. I went, people laughed at me and I thought this was just part of the persecution of being a Mormon missionary.
Brad Singletary (00:05:18):
And I remember driving by were riding by this school one day and these, some of the kids shouted out, look, it’s a learner. And I said, what a learner? What is, what does that mean? And anyway, the joke finally came out that the L plate means learner. It’s a learners permit. I don’t know how you call that. And this is for the, like the 15, 16 year old driver. Who’s just beginning to learn how to drive. So I had the L plates on my bike and it was quite a, quite a joke. I did this for two weeks and finally they let me off the hook. That was my hazing incident there. Welcome to Australia.
Joshua Roy (00:05:53):
Yeah, that was, that was really funny. Actually. I enjoyed immensely, immensely.
Brad Singletary (00:05:59):
So tell us briefly, man, about a little bit more about your seminars, your coaching. I introduced some of those things that you, that you do there, but what got you into this whole world of coaching people and presenting and teaching?
Joshua Roy (00:06:14):
Yeah. Well, when you look at work, it got me into it. I’ve actually got to go back a few years to when I was a teenager. You see, I attended a seminar with my father and my family called “The Mind and You”, and was run by a speaker by the name of Peter McMahon. He traveled to the place where I grew up in Tamworth Australia. That’s about three or four hours in, from Sydney, which is probably the largest city or at least the largest city in all of Australia. And in this seminar, I discovered a lot about the mind and a little bit how the mind works that we were born or that I was born with 12 to 14 billion brain cells. And yet what I tended to do was focus on lack and limitation. The seminar leader explained that it was if, as if I had a million dollars in the bank and yet I was only going and getting 10 cents at every now and then it’s like, I had tables filled with mouthwatering secular and food.
Joshua Roy (00:07:15):
And all I was doing was picking up the scraps on the floor. So he said, we never really tap our full ability. So he had my attention and I was listening to him thinking, well, how do I tap into this? How do I find out what my ability is, what my capacity is and what I could potentially become in my life. And so that’s, that’s really where it got started is my attending seminars. Even before that, I used to listen to my father, as I was driving around, he would listen to audio tapes was Zig Ziglar, audio tapes by Charles “Tremendous” Jones. There was always motivational speakers in my upbringing, but then this one seminar sort of spurred me on a different direction because I had two challenges when I attended the seminar. Well, one big challenge was that I had a startup and I developed the startup. You actually reminded me of that today because I didn’t know that it was troubling me in 1990. When was it? Six or seven.
Brad Singletary (00:08:10):
Yeah, when we, when we met, I think you had only been in Perth first a few months, by the time we left though, that was completely, pretty much gone. But yeah, I remembered that because I also had that challenge as a younger person. And yeah, so there was still some stuttering there. When,
Joshua Roy (00:08:27):
So I learned about affirmations affirmations at this seminar that I went to and I attended the seminar twice. It was a four day seminar. And after learning about affirmations, I started using the affirmation. I speak clearly and well, and I would say this in my mind. So every time before I was about to speak or say something, I would say my mind, I speak clearly. And well, just as a positive statement for myself. And then I would open up my mouth and I would out, particularly if there was a good looking girl around, or I was in a high pressure situation. What I found though was the more I repeated that, those words, that affirmation, the more I was able to get change. The other thing that I had as I was, I was actually doing karate at the time. And after that seminar, attending those seminar, that seminar a couple of times, I ended up becoming the Australian karate champion.
Joshua Roy (00:09:19):
So I wouldn’t say it was a challenge, but I was pushing myself, but not really excelling to the level that I could. And after this seminar, I started unlocking parts of my mind and also parts of my body, because we know that the there’s a mind, body connection there in separately connection. It’s a, it’s a Symbian system, mind and body mind, spirit, body, soul, it’s all one. And when we understand that, we understand that it works together, the mind controls what the body does. And so I was able to get the right mindset to then become the Australian karate champion. So that was a really big achievement. So those are the two things overcoming stutter, becoming an Australian karate champion.
Brad Singletary (00:09:59):
You talk a lot about self-sabotage, what’s that about? Why do we sabotage ourselves and how can we kind of work through that habit?
Joshua Roy (00:10:07):
So self sabotage is a big one, a lot of reason, or the reason why we have self-sabotage comes back to one real when idea and bread you’d know about these, having studied psychology you’d know about cognitive dissonance, cognitive dissonance is that desire that we have to be consistent. And the four areas of consistency that I think about are your words, your intentions, your desires, and your behaviors or your actions. So when you think about it, the dissonance comes into place where our words and our actions are disconnected. Maybe our intentions, our desires, there’s a disconnect there. And when there’s a disconnect, we need to be consistent. So we work out a way to make that consistency happen. Now it can work in either one or two ways. We change our perception of ourselves, we often lower that perception and that helps to reduce the dissonance. The other thing that we do is we change our behavior and if we can change our behavior, then that also reduces that dissonance. So what we’ve got is we’ve got this dissonance that needs to be reduced, and we can only do it in one or two ways. We either change our perception or we change our procedure. They’re the only two things we have control over. Does that make sense? Yes.
Brad Singletary (00:11:30):
So if we’re not aligned, that’s what, that’s where the sabotage comes from, because we, we know this is we’re, we’re, we’re a little bit disconnected from what we really think and feel we’re not behaving that way,
Joshua Roy (00:11:43):
Correct? Correct. And a lot of the reason why this comes about is because of a low self-esteem or because we’ve gone through a situation that’s really tough. And what’s happened is our feelings about ourselves have been reduced. And so when that happens, then we settle in another place we need to be consistent. And so if you, so when it comes to self sabotage, if you find yourself succeeding or doing well, and yet you’ve got this feeling about yourself that’s less than positive, then you will sabotage yourself to bring your behavior back down to where you should be to where you feel as though it belongs. And you know, there’s the imposter syndrome we can talk about. Whereas you feel like, you know, I’m only, only in this situation, I’m basically making it up and what’s going to happen when people find out the real me, you know, it’s smoke and mirrors. What happens when they see the real me that I’m just an imposter here. See that I’m just making it up as I go along. And what we’ll do is sabotage ourselves before somebody else says, or does something that causes us to fall from grace.
Brad Singletary (00:12:53):
Wow. That you’ve already, you’ve already taught me some things here, man. That’s great. So we have to align our behavior with our, with our beliefs. We’ve got to maybe change our beliefs about ourselves. Is that what you’re saying?
Joshua Roy (00:13:06):
There’s two ways to do it. You have to go one or the other. A lot of people get stuck in this thing of shame and guilt, particularly like you and myself, with religious backgrounds. When you’re raised in a certain religion, you can take on everything that you hear as the gospel truth. And when you do that, then you see how far or how disaligned you are with that. Now, a lot of people don’t realize or recognize what shame and what’s guilt because guilt guilt is actually, okay. Guilt can be a very positive thing. It can actually help us to change and do good. But shame is never good. Shame is never good. It’s always going to put us in a hole and leave us there.
Brad Singletary (00:13:53):
So energy, the topic tonight, we’re, we’re doing a series on the Red9. And the one we’re talking about tonight is energy. And I wanted to focus on this one. So in the, under the Red9, we talk about, you know, he sustains vitality and positivity. That’s what an alpha does. He burns premium fuel. He’s intentional about food and water vigorously, active, uses supplements and medication and or medical treatments judiciously, has proper rest. He’s free from addiction. And he creates positive energy with his thoughts, words, and movements. And I have to tell you that when I wrote these things down, when I talk about movements and so forth, well, this, this entire category creates positive energy with thoughts, words, moves, I thought of you, I thought of your work. And I believe in what you’re doing. And so I just wanted to break some of this down tonight. First of all, what are some common things that drag men down with their energy, what, what brings, what bogs us down? I see this all the time in a counseling setting, I’m working with a couple and maybe the wife says, you know, he’s just a funny daddy. He’s just boring. There’s kind of is just, there’s not very much excitement. And he’s just kind of lame. He doesn’t have a lot of energy. What drags us down?
Joshua Roy (00:15:13):
Oh, look, I think it, I think it all comes down to the negative thoughts and feelings we have about ourselves. There’s two fundamental thoughts that just about everyone on the planet has, in fact, I’d say everybody in the planet has, so every listener here has these two thoughts. It’s universal. The first one is I’m not enough. So what we do is we go out there and work really hard to be enough. And yet it’s almost like an unanswerable question. So the question would be, am I enough? And it’s unanswerable. You don’t have an answer for that because it’s something that keeps driving us forward, driving us to make seemingly, to make progress only to feel like there never is any progress. So we’re working really hard. And most people, their way of dealing with this is just to add more fuel to the engine. I’ll be enough, if I get more fuel in the engine. I’ll be enough, if I can work harder. I’ll be enough, if I’m, let’s say working 12 hour days. I’ll be enough, I can work 14 hours a day. And so it’s this desire to try to be enough. So that’s the first one. I’m not enough. The second one is, if I’m not enough, I won’t be loved. And so these are universal. They really are. The reason I found out about these was actually from someone who I use a bit of a mentor, particularly when it comes to energy and that is Tony Robbins.
Joshua Roy (00:16:38):
I went along to his seminars and I’ve been to six of his seminars. In-Person. So with Tony, in fact, there was one one that I went to, one of the seminars that I went to in Townsville, which is a city up in Northern Queensland. And during the date with destiny, which is a six day seminar with Tony Robbins in person every day, I was actually able to speak with him for about 20 minutes. We had a conversation, Tony and I about about certain topics. It was as good as quite fun, actually, a lot of entertainment there. I’ve actually got a recording of it. If you’re interested, I can send you a copy of that. You have listened to it. And that was me and Tony. But Tony is someone who is incredible when it comes to the level of energy he puts out.
Joshua Roy (00:17:27):
As you know, when he does his seminars and workshops, he puts out he exudes energy and he does it for day up. Like he does it for 14 days straight is what he used to do. You know, in his younger days, he was just an incredible machine. And when I saw the level of energy that he was putting out in 2015, when I attended his first, the first seminar of Tony’s that I went to, I came back a changed man. After that, I saw an alpha, I saw someone who could put out energy at a greater level than I’d ever seen before. I’ve never seen anybody wear at their life the way he was wearing at his body. And he was just doing it in the service of others. And he was just wearing himself out. Uone quote that I love is “My life is like my shoes to be worn out in service.” There was a,ua president called president Kimball that said that “My life is like my shoes to be worn out in service.” And I thought of that when I saw this man, just go for it and deliver so much in the way of energy,utowards the audiences, few thousand people there.
Brad Singletary (00:18:34):
So the things that brings down your, you said, I’m not believing that we’re enough. And if I’m not enough, then I won’t be loved. And those are universal. Meaning that we all have a bit of that, that same doubt. How are we negatively impacted by that? What happens when we walk around feeling like we’re not enough, and that we’re not gonna, we’re not worthy of love because we’re not enough?
Joshua Roy (00:18:59):
So your thoughts have a direct impact on your emotions. The words you speak have a direct impact upon your emotions and your emotions have a direct impact upon your physiology. So we’ve got to realize that if we’re thinking and saying things, then our body’s going to respond. If I was to ask you Brad, to describe somebody depressed, how would you describe them?
Brad Singletary (00:19:22):
They’re kind of moping around. They’re looking at the ground. They’re avoiding things. They’re not going out be with their friends or family. They’re just kind of discouraged and talking negatively about themselves. And
Joshua Roy (00:19:36):
We’ve got all that in there. You’ve got the physiology. You’ve also got the thoughts and the self-talk. You’ve got the whole bit. So with the physiology though, you’re looking at shoulders down, usually rounded shoulders. You’re looking at they slump. They, they walk in a, in a posture that’s hunched over. In fact, there was a really depressed man who died and they stretched him out. And then nobody had any idea. This man was about six foot six because he walked around. Everyone thought he’s about six foot tall because he was so hunched over the way he was walking around. And that’s what depression does. Depression makes us shrink. Depression makes us want to be small and unseen. We try and slink into the background, whereas someone who’s energetic and full of life, the alpha that you’re talking about, he’s out there. His chest is up.
Joshua Roy (00:20:25):
His chin is up. He’s looking in at an elevated level. His eyes are up. He’s feeling good about himself. He’s walking on his toes. He’s not dragging himself around. So physiology, I want you to know Brad, plays a huge part when it comes to change, when it comes to well, how I get rid of the thoughts and the feelings of negativity. Physiology is the key. I’ll tell you a story. Actually, there was a young boy who walked into a, to see a life coach. And this, this young man was depressed. And his mother said, what I do with him? He’s depressed. Now. He walked in, he had goth makeup on and he was hunched over his body was hunched over. He was looking down at his toes, just like you described. Anyway, the physician has walked over to him, put one hand on the square of his back, the other hand on his chest and lifted him up straight.
Joshua Roy (00:21:19):
And suddenly he started laughing and he let him go. And he fought, fought forward again. No laughter no smiling, nothing. So he thought that’s it. So picked him up again a second time. He said, that’s how you walk. And suddenly he start laughing again. And he simply explained to the mother teach him to walk properly. He’s going to feel better. You see your physiology has a direct impact upon your feelings and then your emotions affect your thinking. So if you really get to change this around the reason why, or one of the reasons is we’ve got into habits of being lazy with the way that we walk, the way that we move and the more lazy we get and the more things become routine, the more our mood can be low. And we can start thinking to ourselves. We’re not getting anywhere, start feeling bad about ourselves. Stop these thoughts, I’m not good enough. If I’m not enough, I won’t be loved. They start cropping up more and more.
Brad Singletary (00:22:17):
It seems like some people are just kind of born with this naturally positive temperament. Like for example, I would say that about you. You’ve got this extroverted, friendly, funny, smiling all the time. You just seem to have that. Maybe some of that we’re born with that to some degree we’re born with, with this temperamental energy extroversion, you’ll feeling positive energy. But do you believe that people can produce that or, or reduce that based on, your saying that you can do, you can change that based on your posture and the manner of speech and those kinds of things.
Joshua Roy (00:22:54):
Well, you got to understand the emotion pathway. So what is the emotion pathway? The emotion pathway is, well, it starts with an emotion. So Brad, what sort of emotion would you say you’re running today? You happy today? What would I, what emotion would be? Come on.
Brad Singletary (00:23:08):
Stay calm. Cool.
Joshua Roy (00:23:11):
So calm and cool. And that’s fine. Now let’s say you run that calm and cool. You practice that for about a week. Well, we’d say that would turn into a bit of a mood. You ever hear people talk about? Oh, you know, so-and-so’s in a mood. Usually we talk about the mood as being a very negative emotion, less than positive one. But when we run an emotion over a period of time, it turns into a mood. Now what happens if you run that mood for several months? Well, turns into a temperament, right? So you say, what of temperament does this person have? So if you want to change anything, then what you do is you say, well, what mood can I run? What emotion do I want to run more consistently? And so I’ve actually done this. I’ve experimented with myself. And what I did was every morning and you’ve seen some of my videos just get excited every morning, just get really pumped up.
Joshua Roy (00:24:04):
So I’d go to the top of my hill and just jump up and down for about 30 seconds to a minute, every single morning. And then throughout the day, every hour or so I excuse myself. Oh, here I am at work. So I’d slink off to the bathroom. Look around, make sure no one’s there because you don’t want to come across weird. Even now I’m a bit different, unique. And then I just, I just get pumped. I just jump up and down a few times I do so many to get energy moving through my body, coursing through my body. I’d stand up chest high, look up a little bit. And then I’d walk out and back into my work. And what I found was just running that pattern of emotion. Guess what that did to my mood. Elevated it. Yeah. What does that do to your temperament? Elevate it. And let’s say you run it for several years. What happens in? Well, it becomes a disposition. So we’ve got emotion, mood, temperament. Now we’ve got disposition and that becomes like a new personality or a new, personal reality. So if you want to change your personal reality, you’ve got to start now with saying, asking yourself the question, what emotion am I going to practice? Because I want to turn that emotion into a mood and that mood into attempt any of the idea.
Brad Singletary (00:25:25):
So emotion turns into mood turns into what was the next one, temperament, temperament into disposition. Dispostion. This been slumped down for years. You’re saying that they could turn that around and they can effectively create a permanent new disposition for themselves just by daily choosing to run. I like how you said that run a different emotion and they can do that with their body. You’re saying you do that with your body.
Joshua Roy (00:25:54):
Yep. You did that. The reason that I say you do it with your body’s that motion creates emotion. Motion creates, just do a little experiment for me here. This boy here with me. So Brad put your hands together like this, and I want you to be put a big smile on your face and then move your arms out. What we’re going to do is as fast as you can add to beat like this, it’s nice to make sure you got nothing near. So not that slow. So we’re going to go really fast. Ready? I count to three and then we’ll do it together. 1, 2, 3, go and be smart. We’ll do it again. 1, 2, 3 fast. Now just notice just by creating a little bit motion with your body, what happens? What happens physiologically to you?
Brad Singletary (00:26:37):
Yeah. I feel a little spark for a little buzz. A little little pump happened.
Joshua Roy (00:26:41):
That’s all energy. So inside our brain, we’ve got inside the hypothalamus in the brain. I think of it like a pharmaceutical factory. That’s that’s your, that’s where your brain is. It’s a pharmaceutical factory. We’ve got legal drugs where illegal drug dealers for ourself. If we got these drugs in our brain, there’s about a hundred different chemicals. We know we’ve got dopamine and oxytocin and norepinephrine, which is adrenaline. And you’ve also got serotonin, endorphins, all these other. So we’ve got all these chemicals. How do we access them? Well, we access them through our thoughts, but how do we get our thoughts to the place where we can access them? We use our body and this is why people become addicted to gyms because they go to the gym and they pushed them. Wait until they go for that run. They’re moving their body. And when you move your body, those chemicals are released.
Joshua Roy (00:27:37):
The natural chemicals come into your life. That makes you feel good. Makes you feel euphoric. What we’re doing is we’re hacking that by simply moving with speed, with power, and we’re practicing, releasing these chemicals in our mind. Anytime we choose. And you can, you can just choose it. I also use NLP to do that because in NLP, there’s a thing called a, a state elicitation script. Say it again. A state elicitation script. Okay. So a state elicitation script is simply, you would ask the person, in fact, let’s do it with you Brad. So just close your eyes for a moment and think about a time in your life, where you were completely confident.
Joshua Roy (00:28:23):
Think about a specific time. Go back to that time. See what you saw, hear what you heard and feel the feelings of confidence in your body right now. Go ahead and feel those feelings. And now that you’re feeling that I want you to double that feeling and I count in from three to one. As soon as I hit one, I want you to double that feeling in your body. Ready? Three, two, wait for it. And one double the feeling. That’s it. That’s it. I saw it on your face. I saw that little smile. You felt that I guess come back to me now. So just explain to me, what did you just feel then?
Brad Singletary (00:29:04):
Just power. Just, I felt this rush of energy. I just felt like my heart was beating, but, but not in some nervous way. Just with like powerful, confident energy.
Joshua Roy (00:29:17):
Yeah. So that was just, and what was the memory that you had?
Brad Singletary (00:29:19):
I was giving a speech. I had, I hadn’t had an opportunity in this certain realm that I belong to. I hadn’t had an opportunity to speak for 10 or 11 years and this wasn’t that long ago. And I had an opportunity to stand up and, and share. And I was given the freedom to take whatever time that I needed to take during this talk. And I had prepared, well, I had prepared this with my heart and soul, and I knew that I could deliver it with some power I showed up and it was just one of the highlights of my life. And I hate to say that because it was kind of in a service type situation. Wasn’t a professional engagement, but I showed up, I actually recorded this thing. I knew that I was prepared and had a powerful delivery and just, it was, it was a highlight for me.
Joshua Roy (00:30:08):
That’s beautiful as I love that. What’s great about that is you’ve now gone into the past and access to an emotion. And you brought that emotion into the present. Now the beautiful thing about coaching, the coaching that I do is we can take that emotion, put it anywhere. We put it into the print, we can put it out in the future. You can imagine that something’s going to happen in the future. And you take that emotion from the past and you drop it out into the future and what’s going to happen when you’ve got that emotion in the future. Or when you show up to that event, that’s going to be there to greet you. It’s as if your mind is preparing for this eventual outcome. And that’s where it gets exciting. Is that everything that you’ve ever experienced, this is how powerful and also in the mind and body is every emotion you’ve ever experienced.
Joshua Roy (00:30:57):
You can experience, again, they’ve even discovered the people who take drugs and use drugs who have a, you know, a full sensory experience as a result of this drug that they’ve used. They can actually go back using regression techniques and they can experience that same effect as if they’ve taken the drug again, because your mind records everything that you’ve ever been through. Now, if left to its own devices, what do we turn, tend to ruminate on? What do we tend to read? Is that the positive stuff? Or is it, let me ask you, is it the negative stuff?
Brad Singletary (00:31:33):
The fearful, horrible negative things. Yeah, for sure.
Joshua Roy (00:31:37):
That’s it. So if we’re going to change that around, we need to take active control about what emotions of the past that we’re bringing into the present. Now, any of the listeners out there who are depressed or have any negative emotions going on, any fear that’s going on, you’ve got to ask yourself this, what are you reinforcing in your life? Are you reinforcing good things or are you reinforcing the negative? And if left to its own device, that’s what your mind will do because the mind, as we know, it’s designed for survival, it’s not designed to make you happy. So what it does, it looks for what’s wrong and is happy when that doesn’t happen. When it doesn’t happen again, that’s why we have panic attacks out in the future because the nervous system is responding to a trigger that we’ve got from the, from the past.
Joshua Roy (00:32:28):
It’s now in the future that trigger occurs. It could be a person could be a place. It could be a situation. It could be a tiger who have been in the past. Like let’s say, I’m in Africa. And I go into a safari and I go inside the enclosure and suddenly I made a tiger. So I’m faced with this tiger that could eat me. So I go into panic, right? We know about the fight flight response. We know fight flight, rest and digest. We know that there, the response that we have, we have the parasympathetic, which is the heightened, sorry, the sympathetic. And then the parasympathetic, which is the calm, the relaxed. So we go off into this sympathetic state. So suddenly we panic and the blood, as we know, rushes from the major muscle groups. And it goes to the major organs and the major muscle groups.
Joshua Roy (00:33:14):
So that’s why a person’s face can look drained because you don’t, you don’t need blood in your face. You don’t need to think. You just need to act. So you need blood in your muscles in the blood in your major organs. Okay? And that’s, you’re ready for fight flight. Now let’s say that the security was there. He stepped out with a rifle. Suddenly the tiger runs away. You’re now safe, but you’ve had an experience. You’ve had fear run through your body. Now, several years later, maybe he goes back to the states. He gets married, has a couple of children, and they’re going to the zoo, nice fun day at the zoo. And he, they go and see the giraffe and the elephant and all is fine. And then they walk around to the tiger enclosure. And as soon as he sees the tiger, what happens that panic hits?
Joshua Roy (00:34:00):
Again, the heart starts to popup. What’s going on. He knows he’s safe because there’s a mesh wire there. He knows, he said the tiger can’t get to him. Why is he going through that? That’s your unconscious mind keeping you safe. That’s a threat. That’s survival. And that’s why people have panic attacks. It’s a rather simplistic way of explaining it, but that’s what happens. So you go through a situation in your past, your nervous system holds onto it. You ruminate it on an enough so that you know that this response equals survival. Then you use that with painstaking regularity in your future. And what we’ve got to do is we’re going to go back to that first event and we’ve got to make it so that your unconscious mind understands that you’re safe. And if you’re safe, you don’t need to have panic attacks in the future.
Brad Singletary (00:34:52):
Going back to the original, the original trouble that you experienced and re-interpret that, or what, what are you doing with that? Maybe. Yes.
Joshua Roy (00:35:01):
Yeah. So it’s, but it’s reinterpreting in a way Brad that the unconscious mind understands. You see, you can’t use words to do it. We’d like to, because if we could just talk our way through it, everything would be fine. But talking words, language that’s neocortex functioning. Whereas what we’re dealing with is emotion. And we’re dealing with the fight flight response. So we’re dealing with the limbic system, which is the home of the emotions. And we’re dealing with the reptilian complex, which is the lizard brain. And the lizard brain is the most powerful brain of all. But the lizard brain doesn’t understand words and language. So now we’ve got to work out. How do we explain this in a way that the lizard understands that we can then make the change, make the shift? So there’s no longer that fear and panic there. So the lizard brain works in things like colors and movement, colors, and movements, and also emotions throw a bit of emotion in there as well, colors and move. So what we do is we reinterpreted actually I’ll show you with a quick example, Brad. You’re starting to get a bit of age about you. We’re both in our forties.
Brad Singletary (00:36:13):
What are you trying to say?
Joshua Roy (00:36:16):
Well, let me ask you this. Have you got any pain in your body anywhere in your body, any pain?
Brad Singletary (00:36:23):
A little bit of a sore back. Yeah.
Joshua Roy (00:36:26):
So if you say sore back zero to 10, how bad would the pain be? Zero is no pain. 10 is absolute pain.
Brad Singletary (00:36:32):
I say two.
Joshua Roy (00:36:34):
Two is not really good enough to work with you. You’re not going to see a big example, but we’ll do it anyway, because would you like to have zero pain in your back right now? Yeah. And what we’re going to do is begin to use a process called scored psychosomatic neuromodulation.
Joshua Roy (00:36:53):
Okay. It’s better if I just show you rather than tell you. Okay. Because that word is for the neocortex, but what I’m going to do is for the other brains, it’s for the lizard. And we’re going to talk in a language that it understands. All right. So what I want you to do is, is think about this pain in your back, take your finger and go ahead and point to it. Just point to wherever it is. All right. And now tell me if you had to put a color to that, what is the color that represents that pain? First impression, gray, right? Wonderful. What I want you to do, Brad is imagine using the faculty of your imagination, reach in and grab all that gray energy and pull that in front of you and hold it like a ball. Just imagine it’s like a ball and let me know when you’ve got it all.
Joshua Roy (00:37:41):
Cause this stuff sticks. It’ll stick the bone or stick to skin. It’ll stick to joint. So make sure you get all of that great energy. So reach around and grab it all. And let me know when you’ve got all.
Brad Singletary (00:37:52):
I’ve got all of it.
Joshua Roy (00:37:54):
Are you sure? Yes. Excellent. Excellent. So hold it up a bit higher so I can see it. Excellent. So we’re just using our imagination here, but we’re speaking. Remember, we’re speaking in a way that the lizard understands, so we’ve got to communicate differently. So imagine now, as you look at that ball, it’s spinning in a direction. What direction is it spinning? So now we’ve got color and movement. Which ways is it going show me the hands going that way now, because we want to reverse that we’re going to spin it the opposite direction. So grab with both hands and move it the opposite way. And then double the speed. Double the spin, dove with the velocity, double the Adler to double emotion, double the force double. Now Brad says going so fast that it begins to take on a life of its own. And it’s impossible to go back the way it was now. Tell me also this, did it change, color or stay the same? It’s just spinning it there.
Brad Singletary (00:38:45):
Yeah, it’s kind of orange. It’s it’s
Joshua Roy (00:38:47):
Excellent. Grab that orange ball, ball of energy and shove it back into your back where it came from. And just to let know that you see what to move all throughout your mind and all throughout your body, circling with every breath you take with every beat of your heart, just to allow it to keep circulating on the inside, in that same motion and the inside of your body. And tell me, how do you feel? Oh,
Brad Singletary (00:39:11):
It’s great. It’s gone.
Joshua Roy (00:39:14):
What did you notice when you did that little exercise?
Brad Singletary (00:39:17):
Well, I noticed there was this really powerful energy in my hands and arms as I’m moving this thing. And, and it’s like, I, and it’s like, I pulled it back into my back. It was before the pain I was talking about it. It was just a kind of a stiff, dull, achy, just kind of old man back, you know, not really pain. It’s just like, it woke me up a little bit here. It’s gave me a little bit of juice.
Joshua Roy (00:39:39):
Nice energy. So this is energy. What we’re doing is, and what we’ve got to realize is that the lizard brain that’s the home of energy. And if we can communicate in a way, the lizard brain can understand, the lizard brain will know when to give us more energy when to give us that boost when to push us along, because let’s face it, let’s say a depressed Pirker person’s walking along and suddenly they made a target in the path. What are they going to do? They’re going to say, I just eat me on too depressed.
Brad Singletary (00:40:11):
They’re going to run and try to survive, whatever it takes.
Joshua Roy (00:40:12):
They’re going to have more energy than they ever knew they had. And that’s why people can like, even with broken legs and broken limbs, they still run when they’re full of adrenaline. It’s amazing what people can do, what the body’s capable of. Okay. And that’s the lizard. What we’re going to do is access that I actually do this, I do this. Sometimes I’m running up the hill. In fact, if you know much about Roger Bannister, who broke the four-minute mile back in the 1950s Helsinki, if you remember when he was running that four-minute mile actually he went to the Olympics, then he didn’t do it there. But after the Olympics, he was able to break that at full minute record doctors and scientists said it couldn’t be done. He goes out and does it as small meet, only 2000 people. Here’s what he said. He did. He said that he imagined that there was planes flying, overhead, shooting missiles at him. And so it wasn’t just running for a race, wanting to beat a record. He was running for his life. So what he did with that little hack was he got his mind to believe that his safety was in threat, which means it kicked him into sympathetic functioning. And when you’re in sympathetic functioning, you can do more than you can otherwise, do you have more at your disposal?
Joshua Roy (00:41:36):
Sometimes I’ll run up the hill and I’ll imagine there’s a pack of wolves chasing me. I imagine that there’s like, there’s a bear. There’s a bear after me. And here I am racing up this hill and I’m not running just to get to the top of the hill. I’m running for my life. And you do that. You click yourself into sympathetic functioning.
Brad Singletary (00:41:55):
I’ve heard of people talk about like, even like Joe Rogan. I think I heard one time talking about when he’s working out in the gym, he’s imagining that there are people breaking into his home to, you know, murder his family or whatever. And so he’s kind of preparing, and he’s using all this like survival strength and that’s how he pushes himself in the gym. That’s that’s powerful. So we’re, we’re using thought imagination, creative imagery to produce energy.
Joshua Roy (00:42:22):
Brad Singletary (00:42:22):
That’s powerful. I’m curious about you like personally, how did you, I mean, was there a time when you had a lack of energy or when you were down in the dumps or you had, where you were able to use some of this to, you know, recuperate your own energy in life.
Joshua Roy (00:42:40):
Yeah. So 2014 would be the time that I would talk about, I, I went through a divorce in 2006 2004, sorry. I remarried in 2006, but then in 2014, my three teenage children went to go visit with their mother and they didn’t come back. And not only didn’t they come back and I was taken through court. I had domestic violence charges thrown at me, all sorts of things. I went through absolute hell. So as you know, a police officer, so they took my firearm off me thinking that I was going to go and, you know, murder at my ex or something, which wasn’t ever going to happen. I had no idea that this was happening and it was just insane to me. And so for the children’s protection, she felt the need to keep them from me. And it rashly, disrupted our relationship mine in the children.
Joshua Roy (00:43:31):
And so I didn’t see my daughter I’ve started communicating with her now, but it was, it’s been a good what, five years since I had no contact. So yeah, at, in 2014 I went through something really tough. I went through a, a total rejection of three children and it left me feeling very low, very flat. And at that time I had a decision either I sit in that pit and I wallow in my misery, or I dust myself off, pick myself up and get moving. And I chose the latter. I chose to just start working through this. And it was hell, let me tell you for about three years, from 2014 to 2017, and it was, it was torturous. It was difficult, but I kept moving. In fact, during that period of time, I got myself into the best physical shape of my life because I used all that pain as energy.
Joshua Roy (00:44:28):
I used it in a positive way and you can use it in a positive, negative way. That’s what you can do with energy and even negative energy. You can use that. And that’s what I was using. And in 2017, I remember when it happened, I walked out into the woods behind my house. I live near our nature strip and I walked out there and I remember I screamed my heart out for about 20 minutes. Just letting out all of that negative energy about my ex wife, about the children, about the situation I had gone through. And I remember I yelled and something happened during that moment and they actually have therapies like this. Now they have, they have yelling therapy where you go into the woods and you just, you just let it all out. It’s actually quite funny, but what happened was it actually worked and I came back in and there was no more pain and there hasn’t been any pain since.
Brad Singletary (00:45:18):
That’s fascinating to me how we can store up and just kind of this energy gets trapped. But by externalizing it, you’re talking about a, you know, this explosive, you know, this violent voice that you’re out there, I can just picture you on the mountain side or in the nature on the trees. And you’re just screaming. And you’re saying for 20 minutes, that’s quite a, that’s a lot of, that’s a lot of expression. And I love a lot of energy expression. You know, X means out and to press means to push. So this is pushing out this this negative energy. And I’m guessing earlier, you talked about the thought that I’m not good enough, and if I’m not good enough, I won’t be loved. That’s, that’s a universal belief that must have seriously been triggered during this time. Your own children are avoiding you and, you know, kind of pulling back and refusing to spend time with you had to be one of the worst experiences of your life.
Joshua Roy (00:46:12):
It wasn’t just pulling back. It was, it was total rejection and a total, like there was no contact. So I’ve gone from being the major parent. I had eight days of custody, every fortnight to suddenly zero the next week. And not only that, then I had courts chasing me. I had to go and defend myself. I’d had to defend myself against all of these false charges and accusations that came my direction. I tell you what Brad it was. It was, it was a dark time. And it was hard because that’s not me. And I’m thinking, how can somebody even say these things like this is incredible to me. And it just, it just blew me away. It knocked me for six that somebody would even go and say, those things
Brad Singletary (00:47:02):
You talked about, you know, you could either sit in your pit. I love that. I’m going to give him a steal. I’m stealing that little phrase, but you said you kept pushing through, but there must have been a short period of time where you sat, where you sit in the pit where you, did it disable you for a few days a week, a month? I mean, was there some absolutely.
Joshua Roy (00:47:22):
Yeah, absolutely. It for, for several months straight afterwards, my wife and I were just, we were gobsmacked because not only were they away that that’s what I feel, but also with the accusations and the court and the things that were happening in the police, cause I’m a member of the police service. So they went and took my gun and locked it away for fear that I’d retaliate or do something, which just none of that is me. And I just, I just couldn’t get over this. And then also I had friends at work starting to doubt me, like he’s the guys that have been working with me for years. And suddenly they’re now looking at me differently, treating me differently. And I’m like, Hey God, I’m the same guy. You know, this, these are false accusation. And, but how do you do that? How do you, how do you say that? You had to let it run its course.
Joshua Roy (00:48:06):
And it had to go through the system and it took months to go through. And so, yeah, there was some, there was some, a long conversations. My wife and I, but my wife, beautiful woman, Rebecca is her name. And she just loves me. She stood by my side. She trusted me and believed me with everything that I said. She knew that it was it was, you know, that we had possession of the truth and that these accusations were lies. And she stood by me, loved me through it. And you know, the truth. And she always said this at the beginning, she said, look, the truth will come out in the end. And it did. It came out. In fact, I’ll tell you another story. When they first left and went to stay with their mum, as you know, I’m someone who believes in the power of prayer and someone who is Christian and my beliefs.
Joshua Roy (00:48:53):
And I believe that the God is above all and that he answers that he’s there. And I got this strong impression that I needed to go see, go visit my ex-wife and go there. I think the strong impression that I had to go there, I said it to my wife. She’s like, you’re not going to go there. She said, that’s, that’s like walking into the lion’s den. You gotta be careful. You gotta think about this. Anyway, I went to see my superior at work. I was a senior Constable at the time, and I went to see the Sergeant at work and told her what I was planning. And she said this, she said, make sure you take a recording, which I did. So I went to visit and I put my phone on record and I walked in there, walked up to the door and suddenly there was this, just this barrage that came at me and I just asked a few questions.
Joshua Roy (00:49:36):
And then there was more tax that came to us and asked a few more questions. And eventually they shared it at me. Mike’s came out, Sharon, let me, I’ll speaking to her mother. Most of the time she shared, let me leave. And I left. It was only about a week or so later, the domestic violence order came. And she said that during that interchange, I had threatened to kill her. I’d threatened her life. And I listened to the recording. There was no threats there, there was nothing there. And so that’s the one thing that saved me. So I believe that was divine help. That’s what I believe till this day that I was told to go there and prepare myself by having that recording. And I did. And that kept me from going a different way that whole court matter going a different way.
Joshua Roy (00:50:21):
Because as we know with with domestic violence, it’s not beyond reasonable doubt, like with the criminal law, it’s the balance of probability. So is it probable that this could have happened? And if you look at me, I’m someone who’s big and strong and whatever else, absolutely. It’s probable. You’re a man. You’ve got masculine energy and they, you know, some of the, some of the left, you’re talking about a being all, every bit of being an alpha is all toxic. And we know that’s not the case. We know that there is, you know, all the stuff that you teach that it’s masculinity is a good thing. It’s not bad. It’s wonderful. We need that masculinity. It’s good. But it’s a, it’s often not appreciated and not accepted for what it is.
Brad Singletary (00:51:08):
Interesting move you made there too. We talk a lot about, you know, tribe and using a quorum or a group of people or advisors or mentors to make good decisions. And you did that when you said you went to the Sergeant and you told them your plan asked for some input, and that became one of the saving, you know, things that happened is that you had some, you know, a wise person who’s kind of disconnected from the situation who gave you some counsel and you followed that and that saved you and even maybe provided some, some real benefit to you later.
Joshua Roy (00:51:41):
That particular Sergeant, just so there was a woman. So that particular Sergeant was a woman. Wow. Which was great. Yeah.
Brad Singletary (00:51:51):
You can get that wisdom from anywhere. Absolutely. I want to get back to, to energy. So we we’ve talked about thoughts. Talk about words. Like how can our words you know, we’ve talked about imagery is creative. You know, imagining that can happen. How do our words affect how we feel and our physiology and our energy?
Joshua Roy (00:52:15):
The first place I’d go with this question would be two questions. Okay? Because we’re constantly asking questions of ourselves. We constantly do it consciously and unconsciously. You say you and I have two, lots of thoughts, the thoughts you know about and the thoughts you don’t know about. And when we’re going to realize it’s not the thoughts you know about that cause the biggest problems in your life, it’s the thoughts you don’t know about. So what’s happening below the surface. What are those thoughts that we’re not aware of? Whether they’re in, they are unconscious mind. However, what I’ve discovered is that when we say things consciously enough, it begins to trickle down into the unconscious. So if you’ve said things in a negative, less than positive, you’ve asked questions that are negative or like things like why does this always happen to me? And what’s wrong with me?
Joshua Roy (00:53:07):
You come up with answers to, to express those questions. But if you just flip those around and ask the polar opposite and say, what’s right with me, what’s good about me? What can I appreciate about myself? You’re going to get different answers. You’re going to get more empowered answers. So the first thing I’d say is questions. And the other thing I’d say is whatever you say, just realize that when you say it, you can’t take it back. It’s out there. It’s been done. It’s passed through your lips, hopefully from the heart to the lips and then out, or it could just be lip service. So it’s passing from the lips, but eventually what you say impacts not only you, but those around you, who may hear you hear what you’re saying, and you can have either one of two effects, it can have a positive effect, which will cause a positive spiral up in your life, your socializing, your circle of friends, your partner, your lover, or it can have a negative effect. And cause this spiral downwards. You and I have a choice, what are we going to do with our words? Are we going to use them in positive ways? Are we going to repair ourselves by asking better questions? And by speaking in more positive ways, or are we gonna do the reverse?
Brad Singletary (00:54:24):
That’s powerful. People talk about, you know, in the mental health setting, in the counseling center, you know, I can’t, I can’t get over this depression. I can’t get over this feeling. I don’t know what to do with my life. I don’t know how to fix my marriage. And that itself is probably part of the truth. That’s where the truth is coming from because it’s, I I’m hopeless. I don’t know what to do. I can’t fix this this is not changing. This doesn’t go away. And I love what you said there about whatever you say. I just read a book recently in one of the last episodes, we talked about this the topic of like secular spirituality and I’ve read a few different things where it talks about, you know, if, even if you don’t believe in a deity or whatever, the idea of prayer, you know, especially vocal prayer, that’s maybe that’s nothing more than affirmation and trying to kind of hack this system.
Brad Singletary (00:55:13):
And so if you are praying for something, even if you’re praying to the man in the mirror, even if you’re praying to your own psyche, even if you’re just, but to speak the thing that you want to happen, what we say is what we get that’s, that’s what I hear you saying is they’re just as powerful this powerful, like energy that’s created with our words, whatever you say, that’s what you’re going to, that’s what you’re likely to find. And if I say I can’t do it, I don’t know how, we make excuses. That’s one of the little taglines of the Alpha Quorum. You know, no excuses, easy for us to make excuse and,utalk more about words and how, what, what should we say? How do we talk to ourselves? Because we may not be able to choose our physiology directly. But what I’m hearing you say from before is that we can choose it with our, with our actions and our thoughts. That’s how we sit in a physiology. We can program it and you can choose words to say that has an effect in the consequence of that. It, it turns into some, either positive or negative energy. So thoughts, we know thoughts we don’t know. Continue with words, man. I’m just, I’m digging this. You’re teaching me so much right now.
Joshua Roy (00:56:29):
Yeah. So let’s, let’s go back into words again, because what we’ve got to realize about words is that negatives, any negatives that we say the unconscious mind doesn’t understand them. So if you say don’t mess up, all your unconscious mind hears is mess up. So it doesn’t process negatives directly. It’s almost as if they don’t exist because the unconscious mind doesn’t understand don’t or can’t or anything else that sort of that’s all neocortex language. So when you’re saying, I hope I don’t break a leg, or I hope I don’t mess up, or I hope I don’t stuff up, or I hope I’m not nervous or you’re unconscious mean his is nervous stuff up, break a leg, but that’s all it is. So we’ve got to be really, really careful about the language that we use so that we’re programming the unconscious mind in a way that we want it to be programmed.
Joshua Roy (00:57:30):
So instead of saying, I want to lose weight because nobody wants to lose anything. You don’t wanna lose your keys, you wanna lose your wallet, don’t lose your phone. So why would you want to lose weight? So the unconscious mind might say, well, let’s hang onto the way. Whereas if you say, I want to gain slimness, that’s just a, another little way to say the same thing, really, but in a positive. And so we can actually use that type of language with everything that we dom is we can state things in the positive. When I do goal setting with people, we always stated in the positive, anybody says, well, I don’t want this to happen. We say, what would you want to happen? What do you want to see? What do you want to experience? What do you want to be when you grow up? Even though they’re 65, you know,
Brad Singletary (00:58:15):
You talked about earlier when you had this stuttering problem and you would say this affirmation, I speak clearly and well, I think that’s what it was. How long from the time you first uttered that until you felt like you really did speak clearly and well, what was the length of time? I mean, this doesn’t necessarily overnight, but you’re saying you’re planting these like unconscious seeds that turn into something at some point.
Joshua Roy (00:58:37):
Well, here’s the thing, Brad, when you use affirmations, you’re doing it the slow process. So affirmations are neocortex language. Now you’re only activating one part of the brain. So now you’ve got to get from neocortex to the limbic system, and that can take a long time to create those neural networks. And then you’ve got to move from the limbic system to the reptilian complex. And then that’s when change happens, all true change takes place in the unconscious mind. So affirmations, I don’t use them the same way anymore because they’re too slow affirmations take years. So when you say how long, somewhere between two and six years, that’s too slow because people can get rid of that same problem in one or two sessions, one or two weeks tops. If you know the tools. So what you’ve got to do is use not affirmation, and incantation. Oh,
Brad Singletary (00:59:37):
I’ve seen some of your videos on this. So I’m like, yes, we’re here where this is something we really want you to just jump into this.
Joshua Roy (00:59:43):
So an incantation is an affirmation with movement. So what you’re doing is you’re, incanting the words and you using the body. When you use the body, you activate the nervous system. The nervous system is directly connected to the reptilian complex, which is the most powerful brain of all. So think of neocortex as slowest way to change, followed by the limbic system, followed by rapid change, which takes place in the unconscious mind or in the limbo, in the reptilian complex. It’s instant change there. So when you use the words with your mouth and the movements of your body, motion creates emotion. So you’re moving your body with power with a motion, as you move your body in that way, you’re stimulating emotion, you’re bringing emotion to the surface. So now we’ve got the words, neocortex, we’ve got the language, which is sorry, neocortex. You’ve got the movement, which is reptilian complex. And you’ve got emotion being created from that movement, which is limbic system. So now you’ve actually got the whole brain wiring. We know that when neurons fire together, they wire together. And that’s how we create new synopsis or new connections, neurological connections just by simply getting all three parts of the brain or three brains to talk to each other. That makes sense.
Brad Singletary (01:01:11):
Yes, it does. I’m fascinated. So what does this look like? I mean, I’ve seen some of your videos. I’ve seen some of the video and some people might think it’s silly.
Joshua Roy (01:01:22):
I thought it was silly when I first saw it, when I saw, and I actually learnt this from directly from the big man, Tony Robbins, he talked about incantations and I went home and started practicing them for myself. And I practiced them consistently for over four years. And I’ll tell you, first of all, the benefit of it, the benefit, the main benefit of it, and then that little voice in your head that sometimes tells you, you’re not good enough tells you you’re an idiot give up that says all those things. Well, after that three to five months of incantations, every day, their voice went away. Like completely gone, never had that happen before. Now it comes back occasionally, but only when I need something and only, well, most often it’s positive. So if you want to get rid of that negative, self-talk that self-talk that says you can’t do it, or you’re not enough.
Joshua Roy (01:02:13):
Or if you’re not enough, you won’t be loved anything. This is, you’re an idiot. What do people find out if you want to get rid of that incantations are the way to do it. So I’ll show you what it looks like. Okay. I’ll do an incantation. One that I do. I’ll do. My first one is here. Okay. So I Josh see, feel and know the purpose of my life is to inspire with love, with power, with authority and reduce suffering for myself and others. So what you’re using is very big movements and the bigger the movements, the more you’re activating, like I said, the body, which the nervous system is directly connected to the reptile. So we’re activating that part of the brain. So I could say another one. I Josh see, hear, feel and know that I am joy. I am love.
Joshua Roy (01:02:59):
I am compassion. I’m intelligent. I’m faith and courage. I’m happiness. I’m achievement. I’m success. I’m gratitude. And I’m honesty. And I’m respectful of others, especially the women of this world. So those are my values in order. So I go through them quickly again. So I just see, hear, feel, know that I am joy. I am love, I am compassion. I am intelligence. I’m faith and courage. I am happiness. I am achievement. I’m success. I’m gratitude. And I’m respectful of others, especially the women of this world. So those are my 10 core values in order from joy to respect all the way through. There you go. So I incant that.
Brad Singletary (01:03:40):
Wow. So this is now, this is you outdoors. This is in your garage. Where do you, what, what does this happen? You, you go up,
Joshua Roy (01:03:48):
Believe it or not like, you know that I’m in the police service. I’ve had police rock up at my house before, because I’ve been catered and people are thinking I’m yelling at people, thinking that I’m yelling at my wife or something, tell I’ve actually had them turn up thinking there was domestic violence occurring at the house where it doesn’t look good considering my past and those past accusations, it doesn’t look good. But I tell you, this was all part of the healing process for me. It was saying, I need to get back on top. I need to feel good about myself again. I’ve been in this pit of despair. How do I build myself up? And this was one of those key elements now. And it was it’s fast. When you start doing this, you change quickly, much more quickly than affirmations, much more quickly.
Brad Singletary (01:04:35):
The, actually I learned about some of this stuff when I was there in Australia, but seeing like, you know, the rugby teams, like the all blacks, you know, and they would do this, this haka. Yeah. You know, and it’s just this war ritual. And I have to believe that this stuff is ancient. This isn’t, you know, Tony Robins didn’t make this stuff up. This probably has existed and he’s tapped into it. And, you know, found that the power of this and why this works, but even even played football and throughout my life, in my younger years, you know, there were these things that we would do and in, and, and, you know, the whole, the whole team is, you know, to begin the, to begin the practice, to begin to warm up and we’re just clapping like this, and it just becomes this, you know, and there’s this raw stuff or whatever, but it’s, it’s powerful.
Brad Singletary (01:05:27):
One of them is me into this field was I was in a, probably a psychology 101 class. And I went to one of the professors and said, Hey, you know, I’m on the football team here. And I’m curious about how psychology can help me. And he shared some things about imagery and in these different things that he talked about movement, and he said, you ever seen these guys on TV? These athletes, you watch them on TV during the game. And they’re walking around like this. And I was like, yeah, yeah, I know. I know that I know exactly the movement. And he said, just do that for a minute. And so I started to do that. And he said, do you feel that little change? You feel that little just kind of going, yeah, yeah, yeah. I’m ready. You know, and then he said, do this. He said, look at the ground and do this.
Brad Singletary (01:06:14):
And I thought, oh, bummer, what a bummer, what a sad, it was just a little thing. And I said, yes, there’s something about movement. And the body that connects chemically. And it affects our thinking. It affects what we think is happening around us, how we perceive. So incantations man. So you wrote this, this is, these are, this is like a value statement or something that you have of your, of your own. I dunno, kind of mission statement or something. You, you listed off these values, right? You wrote that first, maybe. And then you learn to recite this with these explosive movements. And you’re out there, man. When I saw that, it made me laugh and positivity. Yeah. There’s probably some freak out there. Who’s lost his mind. Yeah.
Joshua Roy (01:07:04):
It’s weird stuff, but it’s weird stuff.
Brad Singletary (01:07:06):
But everything’s weird. And, and, and to ground, you know, to close the curtains and to avoid the family dinner and to, and to, and to be depressed and sad. That’s weird too. You can choose the level of energy that we have. And so we’re all going to be weird. We’re all going to be a little weird. What have you weird, positive or weird negative. And so it just, that’s exactly right. That’s what I’ve been. I’ve been trying to get this figured out and schedule this with you for for years now. So I’m still happy to hear. So you wrote a little, I don’t know what you call that your vision,
Joshua Roy (01:07:40):
So that, that’s my, that’s my values list. So I call that my values list. Now my values each have rules attached to them as well. And did you know that you can manipulate the rules and you can make your life better just by changing your rules.
Brad Singletary (01:07:54):
Okay. What do you mean?
Joshua Roy (01:07:56):
For example, what’s one of your values. Just give me one of your values.
Brad Singletary (01:08:00):
I would say honesty.
Joshua Roy (01:08:02):
Honesty. Honesty is a valuable. So how, what has to happen for you to feel that feeling of honesty? What has to happen?
Brad Singletary (01:08:15):
I guess I have to be aware of what the truth is. I have to be aware of what, what is the honest truth? The honest way awareness.
Joshua Roy (01:08:26):
Brad Singletary (01:08:31):
I have to do honesty. I mean, if I’m going to feel that I have to be doing that, I guess I have to tell.
Joshua Roy (01:08:38):
So you need to be aware of honesty. You need to do honesty. Is there anything else you want to feel honest? You have to be aware of it and you have to do honesty. So in order for you to feel honest, you have to be aware of what honesty is and you have to do it. Now what if there was an easy way to feel honest, to meet that value, like a really easy way. A lot of the times what people do is they have values that are really hard to meet because of the rules they set up, for example, or in fact, I’ll give you another one, love. How do you, what has to happen in your life for you to know that you’re loved? Like what does your wife or your children have to do? What all the things have to happen?
Brad Singletary (01:09:20):
Say nice things. They’ve got to look out for me. They’ve got to kind of anticipate my needs and come through with it and, you know, bring me what I want, you know, make these? There’s a lot.
Joshua Roy (01:09:35):
So with a, with a value like that, when you say there’s a lot, what we do unconsciously is we add all of those things together in one. So they’ve got to meet, not just one of those things, not just look out for me and say, nice things to me and you know, do things for me, but they’ve got to do it all. And if you only get one portion of that, you don’t feel loved until you get it all. That’s the way our unconscious mind works. It’s it doesn’t it doesn’t, it doesn’t make separate them. It puts it all in one team. So you’ve got one emotion or one value, which is love and it heaps it, all the rules together. That’s what we do unconsciously. Whereas the way I’ve done love is I’ve separated them. So what I do is if my wife’s smarter than me, I feel love if my children say nice thing to me, I feel love if this happens.
Joshua Roy (01:10:27):
So what I do is I’ve set it up so that it’s really easy for me to feel love, to feel loved. And it’s hard for me to feel bad. So I go and have a look at my away from values, rejection, a few other ones that are put there and I make them really hard to meet. Whereas the way your unconscious mind works, that makes your good values really hard to meet. And your negative values really easy to meet. And that’s why so many people are negative. So what we can do is we can actually do coaching sessions where we can turn that around. We’ve got to discover what your values are, what your rules are and how hard you’re making your life for yourself,
Brad Singletary (01:11:04):
Setting up this impossible, these impossible things that it’s just too difficult. And you’d never feel that well, just not loved. I’m just not capable of having this thing. And you’re saying, it’s your own fault. You may be.
Joshua Roy (01:11:18):
I’m saying, well, it’s not your fault. It is your responsibility. It’s not your fault. You can do better once you know better. So anyone out there thinking, oh, it’s my fault on doing now. It’s not your fault. You just don’t have the education, get the education, work out how your values and rules work and then make the changes.
Brad Singletary (01:11:41):
Wow, this is so awesome. I love what you’re teaching me here, man. I’ve got advanced education in some ecology and mental health. And I feel like yours has far surpassed mine. What you understand about behavior it’s man, you know, I think I’ve just been trained in a model. That’s about illness. You know, I’ve been trained in illness. It sounds like you’ve been trained in well,
Joshua Roy (01:12:05):
Unbelievable stuff. Like I like honestly, Brad. I’ve worked with, I tell you one story. I worked with a guy who was a quadriplegic. So this guy could move his left arm just a little bit. And the doctors are baffled. Like, how can you move your arm? He had T3 and T4 problems there. He shouldn’t have been able to move anything below his neck. So it just baffled them. How can you even move your arm? Anyway, I did some work with him and I went and said, where, you know, let’s see if we can get you to move your arm a bit more. Cause he could move a little bit emotion. I said, let’s, let’s see what we can do. Let’s do something good. So I said, let’s just get excited. I said, what excites you? When he says football, he was speed tackled in football that ended his career and put him in a wheelchair.
Joshua Roy (01:12:48):
He also said that his son plays football and he loved watching his son’s football matches. So I said, go back there. So I use that state elicitation 60%. Think about how exciting it would be. If your son scored a try. I said, go back to that time. See what you saw, hear what you heard. And I’ve got so excited. I was jumping around the room. Like if you ever sent me, he seen somebody in a football match or in a soccer game, who’s just scored the try. And maybe it’s the winning try. And they go and do those big fist pumps in the air. That’s what I was doing back and forth in the room. Like I was doing these massive fist pumps. He’s getting excited, like just lying there in the bed and he’s head was bobbing around and he starts gurgling. And I think into myself, I know I’m going to kill the poor fellow.
Joshua Roy (01:13:30):
He hasn’t been this excited for a long time, so girdling right. He’s his heads bouncing around. And then I stopped and I said, how do you feel? Are you okay? He says, are you, it’s just, it’s hard to swallow. I said, okay. As long as you’re all right, let’s do it again. So we got into thinking that something else exciting. And I’m jumping around, I’m doing these fist pumps in the room, his head’s bobbing up and down. He starts gurgling again. But he came through, okay. At the end of it, I said, raise your arm up. He lifted his arm up above his head. Like he doubled the amount of motion there. And I said, if you ever lifted your arm that high before he looked like this. And then when he saw it, he just, he was just shocked. His eyes went big. He doubled his amount of movement in his arm.
Joshua Roy (01:14:12):
Just, it was about a five minute exercise of getting excited. That’s what energy can do. Energy has the power to heal. Energy can change your whole life. It’s incredible, but that’s not the end of the story. That’s just the first visit. I came back and visit this guy a second time and he’s lying in bed and his arms still moving. He’s got all his motion. He can use a phone. He has got no feeling though. And I said, let’s move your other arm. So he did another technique. Nothing was working. I’m scratching my head thinking what’s going on? Why isn’t this working? And then I had a flash of inspiration. And whether you believe in God, the universe, your higher self, I just had this thought pop into my mind. And it said, ask him where the belief is. I said, where is the belief that you can’t walk again?
Joshua Roy (01:14:57):
He said, it’s in my left toe. I asked him where the belief was. And he said, it’s in my left big toe. So I said, okay, let’s move your toe. So bread. I use the same technique. I’ll just use it the year before I said, imagine there’s a coloring your toe. What color is that energy or that belief that you can’t move it. He said, it’s red. I said, now imagine that you can drag that energy out. Now he didn’t couldn’t use his hands. So he used his eyes. He was using his eyes, very expressively to pull the energy out of his toe and I could see it. And he said, and I said, now, is it still the same color or a changed color? It was still the same. I said, it’s spinning in a direction. Which way is it spinning? He showed me with his eyes.
Joshua Roy (01:15:37):
I said, spin it the other way. Faster. Double speed, double spin, double the intensity, double the velocity, double the motion, double it. So it’s going so fast. I didn’t say now, shove it back in your toe and notice what happens in your body. He goes like this. He does this intense theory, these tote. And he says, look, look, look, I’m looking at his face. I look at his toe. I start grabbing the blanket and I’m pulling it off. And his toe was exposed and his toes wiggling back and forth like this. We can’t have seven wiggles. He just kept wiggling with his toe. And I looked at him. He was so excited. It was so exciting for him. This guy’s a quadriplegic. You can’t move your toe. There’s no signal. He hadn’t moved these toes since the injury, 10 years earlier. And here he was wiggling his toe.
Joshua Roy (01:16:19):
And I’m thinking to myself, this is amazing. And then his parents who are deeply religious told me never to come back again because they didn’t like whatever witchcraft I was using. And so I couldn’t work with him further. So that was, that was a bit disappointing.
Brad Singletary (01:16:34):
Witchcraft. You’re healing, the man who can’t walk and exactly right.
Joshua Roy (01:16:39):
That was this guy. This is a mate. Like I just have, it’s so fascinating. But I was working with there’s hundreds of people, bad backs, knee pains pain in the neck, cancer, all sorts of things. And I’ll just go and get rid of all the pain in their body. And it’s just, it just blows my mind and it just keeps working. And so I just keep using it. So people have got pain, I say, right, let’s get it. Let’s get the energy. Let’s spin it. And the pain is gone.
Joshua Roy (01:17:04):
It just Brad. I dunno, like for some time I was looking at my hands, just, you know, who am I? Am I, you know, why am I Buddha? Or am I, you know, Jesus Christ reincarnate or what is going on here? Because we hear about all these amazing healers in history. And I’m starting to understand that it’s energy, energy is the healing. And we’ve just got to speak in a way that the unconscious mind can understand you were born with 70 to 100 trillion cells in your body. And each one of those cells undergoes up to 100,000 chemical processes every second, every second. I mean that number 100,000 chemical processes in every one of the 70 to 100 trillion cells in your body, how could you possibly keep track of that? Consciously? Most of us can’t remember five to seven items. When we go to the grocery shop, how are we going to take care of all of that? That’s what your unconscious mind can do. That’s how powerful you are. And we don’t even realize we’re not even scratching the surface to how much raw power is in the reptile the most powerful brain of all. So
Brad Singletary (01:18:13):
I work with people on what types of issues do people come to you with? You’re working with clients, you have these individual coaching things, you’ve done some seminars and stuff. What, what is the typical situation where someone comes in or not typical, but maybe the range. What is the range of who wants to who needs this kind of thing?
Joshua Roy (01:18:32):
Yeah. So I work with single mums quite a lot. If it was quite interesting, I work with men quite a lot. And often times I’m working with people concerning relationships, because think about it, however good it is to have good health, whoever it is, however good it is to have good finances. However, however good it is to have a connection with God or the universe of your highest self. If you’re doing it alone, you’re not leaving. You’re not really living to the full extent of living. When you’ve got someone to share with, and you’ve got a high functioning relationship, then you’re going to have so much juice, so much drive so much happiness in life. That’s really, to me, the key thing. And so one thing that I do help people with is relationships. I’m a relationship coach. So a lot of times it’s single moms that are looking to overcome some past hurt and get back into this position with are able to attract the right type of person into their life.
Joshua Roy (01:19:38):
And I work with men who want emotional mastery to be able to work out well, why do I react in certain ways to why do I say things? Why can’t I control this sex drive that I’ve got? Well, what’s wrong with me? And I’m here to tell you that there’s nothing wrong with you. Men have 10 times the testosterone running through their body as the average woman that that’s where you are. So that’s what you’re dealing with. You have testosterone in your body, you’ve got to somehow deal with that and it’s okay to be a man. It is okay to want sex more than your level one sex. That’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with that. That doesn’t mean there’s your ad normal. There’s something wrong with you. You completely normal for that. What I help people do is to channel that energy and to get energy working for them and to work out how to have a high functioning relationship by not only looking after their own needs, but focusing attention on the needs of your lover,
Brad Singletary (01:20:35):
Man. So this is not only about like individual performance or personal success in life. This is this also the things that you teach and being able to master energy affects your relationships. Of course it does. You bring yourself to the relationship and it has to, you, you have to have some control of that. Maybe, especially in relationships, we can fumble through a job or a situation where we’re, where it’s alone. We have to be, you know, accountable for some productivity or some, some task in our job. But man, they’re the highest level of negativity comes in life through relationships. You know, that’s where we feel like a failure. That’s where we talked about the impostor syndrome. That’s where we feel like we can’t proceed or progress in life. And this all has to do with the ability that we have or the inability to control our energy.
Joshua Roy (01:21:35):
Yes, yes. And channel it. And we can use that sexual energy in a very productive and positive way. We’re able to channel that. We’re able to master it. And, and that’s, that’s exciting when we, when we’re able to do that. And it’s okay. And that’s the first thing that I tell I tell men is it’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with you. You, you are who you are and that’s okay, wherever you are at a starting point, you’ve got to get rid of this shame in your life. You see guilt says I did something wrong. Shame is I am wrong. There’s something fundamentally wrong with me. I’m a mistake. That’s a different. So in one, you’re looking at the behavior that you do. That’s what guilt is. You’re looking at your own behavior and you may feel guilty about some of that. And that’s okay. But when you start feeling shame, that means that your wrong, your bad you’ve been made or created to be a mistake. And so we’ve really got to get away from that. And so what I do is I tell people that you’re perfect. Just the way you are. You’re perfect. You don’t have to change anything. You’re perfect. Just the way you are. And just the way you aren’t, that’s also something that NLP taught me and our piece says, you’re okay. You don’t need to be fixed. Everything’s fine. Would you like a different quality of life? Would you like different outcomes? We could help with that.
Brad Singletary (01:23:07):
NLP neuro-linguistic programming, is that correct?
Joshua Roy (01:23:10):
Yes. NLP neuro-linguistic programming. So think about neuro as being the brain, the neurons in the brains. And there that we know that they’re connected through axons neurological pathways connect many neurons together. And we know that when habits are formed, we get a myelin sheath that wraps around it, which causes the signal or the electricity to run through the mind 100 times faster. That’s why addictions are so hard to get rid of. So when you’ve got an addiction, that means you’ve got a fully myelinated pathway in your brain that leads you to the addiction. Fully myelinated means that the signal in that part of your brain travels 100 times faster than a new thought or a new signal would fall, will travel. Now that’s difficult to change, but we can do it. We can change and break addictions,
Brad Singletary (01:24:07):
Man. You’re talking about such high level stuff. I mean, I, I just, I had no idea probably how poor my own level of energy is, you know? And I’ve just been so three weeks now without energy drinks. I actually was, I was drinking five monster energy. I don’t know if you have that brand there, but it’s like a red bull or they have they’re in Australia. But five of these a day, I wake up in the morning and I was grouchy and grumpy until I had, you know, 135 milligrams of caffeine or a hundred, 140 milligrams of caffeine. And then I’ll do that five times a day. And I did that since 2009. And I’m
Joshua Roy (01:24:48):
So bad for you.
Brad Singletary (01:24:52):
So I’ve just been drinking water, nothing but water for the last 21 days. Today’s the 21st. So November 1st I stopped. And I, and I, and I think I myself have kind of simplified what all goes into our energy levels. I mean, it’s not just about physical health. You’re talking about the connection between, you know, body and mind and spirit, your words the way that you, the things that you imagined movements, and we’re not talking exercise movements, we’re talking about movements that tap into that, to that lizard brain. You guys were talking about this because men must be better. Our attitude, our actions, our attributes must be stronger. We have so much work to do. And people all around us are just desperate for us to be leaders. And that means the discipline and the ability to, to not be a victim, a victim of our circumstances, our bodies, our thoughts, or any really any condition that limits us.
Brad Singletary (01:25:52):
So there’s so many things that drains our energy and some of that could be controlled. We’ve outlined some things here that you can improve ways that you can improve vitality and positive energy in the future. We’re going to have some other guests who are going to talk about physical activity, wellness of medical things diet and so forth. You guys thank you for being with us. Please share our show with men in your life who could use a dose of some alpha in their life. Feel free to share your feedback and reach out to us on social media. I want to get back to you really quick, Josh, and ask how people can contact you. How to, how do people find you or get in touch with you if they want to do some coaching or whatever many of our listeners are here in the states. We have someone in Australia all over the world actually. But how do they find you? How can we link to you?
Joshua Roy (01:26:45):
I’m running free meetups pretty much every week. So in New York and in also I in Philadelphia and in Chicago, it’s the meetup group is called life coaching and neurological repatterning.
Brad Singletary (01:27:04):
Life coaching and neurological repatterning, and we’ll get a link and we’ll post some of that stuff in the show notes. These are virtual meetups. That what type of, how does this look?
Joshua Roy (01:27:15):
So yeah, basically people come on, they zoom in and I do introduction meetings. And so just so you know, I’ll run a two hour meeting and I’ll do one today and one tomorrow on a totally different topic. So that’s the sort of thing that I’ll do. And I also do four hour webinars every month. They’re paid webinars. And so my clients come along to those and also I do life coaching. So I have individual clients, I have individual clients, I have group coaching clients. I also have group webinars that I run and also have free webinars. So I’m very active and busy teaching this information because I think, and regardless of whether people come and participate with me in the paid webinars or do coaching with me, I love them to come and get the free stuff. And if you even like, I ask people, if you want me to, I’ll send you out some of the recordings that I’ve got, because I’ve got heaps of recordings on so many different topics. And that’s why I can, I can speak the way I can on a vast number of topics, because I do have a lot of information in my mind. And that today was just, we were just skimming the surface. Cause there’s so much more.
Brad Singletary (01:28:22):
I have a, I have a feeling that I’m going to be talking to you again. Maybe just personally, to kind of get some, some thoughts on, you know, just some direction that I may take, but also on this show. And as a part of getting you connected with other men. I really appreciate, you know, I spent 20, 25 years since we’ve talked in person. We once lived, we were roommates for a month or so, and had a friendship throughout our time there in Australia. And it’s been, you know, before even social media was invented we had a friendship and we, we live on the other side of the planet from each other. And here we are connecting in this beautiful way. And I’m just very thankful to have some of this knowledge and information that you shared today. Man, appreciate you being with us again until next time you guys, no excuses, alpha up.
Gentlemen, you are the alpha and this is the Alpha Quorum.